DoS jokes
Where do alien cows come from?
- The Milky Way.
Where do Down syndrome kids go shopping downtown?
What kind of shoes do ninjas wear? Sneakers.
What does a grape do if a rhino is about to squash it?
Nothing, it just lets out a little wine.
Q: Why do Skeletons hate the cold?
A: It sends chills up their spine.
What's the difference between a five-year-old and a Democrat?
The five-year-old doesn't expect you to do everything for them.
(Vote for Ted Cruz, Ben Shapiro 2020)
Q. What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A. A gummy bear.
Do you like me? Joke... Well come on!
BOOMSHACKALATA!
Director: Hi, we are making a huge cliffhanger in this movie.
Actor: Really? What do I do?
Director: You will play the part of the cliff. (holds up hanging rope)
Why do midgets need a lot of books at school?
So they can reach the top of the desk.
What do you call a skeleton in the snow? A numb skull.
What do you call a smart blonde?
Nonexistent.
Q: What do you call white people on a black bus?
A: Oreo
How do clarinet players play a song?
They reed their music.
Father: "The church is on fire! GET OUT! GET OUT!"
Priest: "Ok, what about the children?"
Father: "FUCK THE CHILDREN!"
Priest: "Do you think we'll have time?"
Why does Stephen Hawking only do one liners?
He can't do stand-ups.
Do you want to hear a money joke? "Never mind, it makes no cents."
How do you fit 53 babies into a box?
First get a blender...
What do you call a knight that has one arm? A first battle night.
What do you call a knight that lost both arms? A two battle useless knight.
What do you call a cross between a computer and a vampire bat?
Love at first byte! <3