DoS jokes
What do you call a green boner? The Grinch.
How do you get a baby to stop crying?
Simple... you staple its mouth shut.
How do we get a butt? God made us like that, and we can't change it. If you wanted to, you have to die <:
What do you call an emo kid's suicide live stream?
America's funniest home videos.
How do you communicate to the dead?
Jump up and down on the ground and speak in Morse code!
Do you have a halo, cause I can give you one.
Do you have a halo?
'Cause I can give it to you.
How do you get a nun pregnant?
Fuck 'em.
Why do orphans eat cereal with water? Because their dad never came back with the milk.
What do incest families do on Halloween?
Pumpkin.
A priest walks into a wine store.
"Do you have any 10-year-olds?" Seller: "What the f- Oh, you meant 10-year-old wine." Priest: "I said what I said."
What do you call a bad joke?
A bad Noah!
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah
What do you call a guy on fire in a wheelchair?
Hot wheels.
What do you call the type of photo an orphan takes?
A selfie.
Why do all orphans get iPhone X's?
There isn't a home button.
Why do people love camping?
Because it's in tents!
What do sperm say while just in?
"We need to go deeper."
Person: Hey, do you know what's the best thing in life?
...
You do realize that I said nothing, right?
Me: Exactly :)
Me: Hey! Do you know how to tie a knot?
Person: Yea, why?
Me: Cause I need help tying this noose :)
Kid: Aye, Mum, I'mma do something Dad could never do.
Mum: And that is?
*Kid walks out.*
*Kid comes back in with milk.*
Mum: I'mma beat ya ass!