DoS jokes
What's something a depressed person can do that a regular person can't?
The depressed person can scan themself.
What do you call a person who died in war?
Little Johnny.
What flour do you give an orphan?
Self-raising.
Do not sort... that's bad... *sigh in depression*
Roses are red, Violets are blue, You are so ugly, Do not tell me that is really you.
Little Johnny was in kindergarten, and his teacher said, "Okay, everyone, tomorrow you must come to school and recite the first three letters of the alphabet." Johnny didn't know the alphabet, so he decided to ask his family. He walked into the kitchen to find his mom on the phone. He says, "Mama, what's the first letter of the alphabet?" His mom doesn't notice him standing there and says, "If you don't shut the fuck up right now-" So he goes to find his brother watching TV, and he says, "Tommy, what's the second letter of the alphabet?" His brother doesn't notice him and says, "I'm Batman." So he went to his grandma who was knitting and says, "Grandma, what's the third letter of the alphabet?" The grandma then realizes she left her biscuits in the oven for too long and says, "My biscuits are burning! My Biscuits are burning!" Satisfied with the answers given to him, he thinks it over and goes to school the next morning. When his teacher comes to Johnny, she says, "Johnny, what are the first three letters of the alphabet?" "If you don't shut the fuck up right now," Johnny says. "Who do you think you are, young man, to talk to someone like me that way?" the teacher asks. "I'm Batman," Johnny says. The teacher whups his ass, and little Johnny says, "My biscuits are burning! My Biscuits are burning!"
Later that day, he understands what happened and can't tell which was worse, that he accidentally cussed at his teacher or that his family was ignoring him.
What do you call Peg and Cat from Peg + Cat? Egg + splat.
Eggy joke for all to enjoy!
OK, guys, quick update, what is going on with Freshfry, Drew, and Alya?
All they're doing is fighting, and I want to put an end to it. So Freshfry, Drew, and Alya all need to read this, OK. First, Freshfry, you should've just said OK the first thing he said, and Drew... really? You had to keep egging him on. I don't know about Alya, but it's like cats and dogs fighting. Just please stop fighting :(
Q: What do you call a cow stuck on a barb wire fence?
A: Udderly destroyed.
Why do orphans have water in their cereal?
Because their dad never came home with the milk.
Alright ALYA and drew ALYA's boyfriend!! Have a good fucking life, I hardly even think drew is real but uk whatever I've passed on but DREW if u fucking wanna beef, I'll fight u bro, ur prob a stick, I'm fucking doing push ups 4 times a week 100 each.
Why do you keep repeating the same joke?
What do you call 6 gay men going to war?
Rainbow 6 Siege.
What do suicidal people and apples have in common?
They both hang from trees.
What do Hostess Twinkies and the cock of a gay man have in common?
š š š š š š š¦ š¦ š¦ š¦ š¦ š¦ šØ šØ šØ šØ
What do you call a gay man that is not a vegetarian?
A cocksucker.
What do physically handicapped gay men do after they are done belching? They wipe their mouths on their light blue handkerchiefs after they are done sucking cocks.
Why do four polish heteroflexable men like to suck on four of the cow's udders? Because a bull has only one.
What do you call an epileptic in a lettuce field?
Seizure salad.
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