DoS jokes
A high school student and his best friend were rushing to class after his best friend caused them both to be late. His best friend asked, "Would you like to hear a joke?" "Sure," he replied. "What do you and your sister have in common?" "I don't know." "Because of me you're both late for your next period."
I went to the local butcher's and asked him what happened to his Saturday boy. The butcher replies, "I had to fire him, I found him with his dick in the meat slicer!"
"What did you do with the meat slicer?" I asked.
The butcher says, "I had to fire her too!"
Alternative punchline:
"I had to call social services, she was only 14."
Why do orphans love to play family?
Because it's the closest they will be to being normal.
How do you get an orphan sad?
You say you will tell their mom that they have been a baaaaaad boy.
What do you call an Indian gravedigger?
Digdeep.
Roses are dead, violets smell like poo, I got a big fucking shotgun, what you gonna do?
Why do orphans not have parents?
Answer: Their parents are yeet dead dead.
Why do orphans not love their parents?
Because they don’t have parents.
Why do orphans not play baseball?
Because they can't make a home run.
Why do deer stay in front of a moving car?
To commit suicide.
What do people have that orphans don't? A family.
Q: What movie do orphans hate?
A: Fatherhood.
Why do balls be hairy? Cause they stinky!
What do you call a Turk eating turkey?
A cannibal.
What actor do orphans hate?
Dom Terreto (family).
Alright, so I have a few orphan jokes. I'm gonna put them all in one message.
Why can't orphans be gay? They have no one to call "daddy."
Why can't orphans go on a field trip? Parent signature: ______
New teacher: I used to be an orphan as a kid. Students: hahaha Teacher: Is anyone missing? Students: No one, just your parents.
Why did the orphan become a prostitute? They kept calling everyone "daddy."
Why do orphans have the iPhoneX? Because it has no home button.
How do Chinese parents name their children?
Dropping a pan down the stairs. Bing, Bong, Dong.
How do you give a redneck a circumcision? Kick his sister in the jaw.
Why do midgets have to wear a green bright jacket when crossing the road?
Because they will get turned into a pancake even more.
It's not funny, I know.
How do I get out of the toilet seat? Help me, please. I'm very stuck!