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This is so sad I actually used to be nice but now I'm starting to turn toxic because it is losers on the website

I had an evil thought yesterday which could be just as worse as turning a cat into a pencil case, and having its but as a sharpener and its tale as a zipper. What if you gave a container full of food to a pregnant lady, with a label hidden under the lid stating "Happy Miscarriage"

GENESIS 42 Joseph’s Brothers Go to Egypt 1When Jacob learned that there was grain for sale in Egypt, he said to his sons, “Why do you look at one another?” 2And he said, “Behold, I have heard that there is grain for sale in Egypt. Go down and buy grain for us there, that we may live and not die.” 3So ten of Joseph’s brothers went down to buy grain in Egypt. 4But Jacob did not send Benjamin, Joseph’s brother, with his… Read more

GENESIS 38 Judah and Tamar 1It happened at that time that Judah went down from his brothers and turned aside to a certain Adullamite, whose name was Hirah. 2There Judah saw the daughter of a certain Canaanite whose name was Shua. He took her and went in to her, 3and she conceived and bore a son, and he called his name Er. 4She conceived again and bore a son, and she called his name Onan. 5Yet again she bore a son, an… Read more

You me, gas station..what are we having for dinner? sushi ofc, uh oh looks like there was a roofie in our gas station sushi, we black out and wake up in the sewers were surrounded by fish, horny fish, you know what that means FISH ORGY, the stench draws in a bear, what are we going to do.. WERE GONNA FIGHT IT. Bear fight, bear handed, bear...naked? oh yes please. we befriend the bear after beating it in a brawl, we r… Read more

Daily Challenge: Turn on light mode for the first time. If you already have it on, your crazy. /j

Gonna raise up a tall glass Tonight as we look back Back on all the life that we lived through Yeah, the things that we drink to Roads that we choose, friends that we make Turns that we miss and the hearts that we break The words that we say and the ones that we don't Lines that we cross and the ones that we won't Tears that we cried, the dreams that we dreamed Stars that burnt out and the stars that we reached The pictures we take, the stories they tell And the moments we keep for ourselves

GENESIS 19 Sodom and Gomorrah Destroyed 1The two angels arrived at Sodom in the evening, and Lot was sitting in the gateway of the city. When he saw them, he got up to meet them and bowed down with his face to the ground. 2“My lords,” he said, “please turn aside to your servant’s house. You can wash your feet and spend the night and then go on your way early in the morning.” “No,” they answered, “we will spend the ni… Read more

GENESIS 18 The Three Visitors 1The Lord appeared to Abraham near the great trees of Mamre while he was sitting at the entrance to his tent in the heat of the day. 2Abraham looked up and saw three men standing nearby. When he saw them, he hurried from the entrance of his tent to meet them and bowed low to the ground. 3He said, “If I have found favor in your eyes, my lord, do not pass your servant by. 4Let a little wat… Read more

GENESIS 14 Abram Rescues Lot 1At the time when Amraphel was king of Shinar, Arioch king of Ellasar, Kedorlaomer king of Elam and Tidal king of Goyim, 2these kings went to war against Bera king of Sodom, Birsha king of Gomorrah, Shinab king of Admah, Shemeber king of Zeboyim, and the king of Bela (that is, Zoar). 3All these latter kings joined forces in the Valley of Siddim (that is, the Dead Sea Valley). 4For twelve … Read more

You are so dumb that when you were driving to disneyland you saw a sign that said "Disneyland Left" so you turned around and went home.

You. Me. Gas station. What are we getting for dinner? Sushi of course. Uh oh! There was a roofie in our gas station sushi. We black out and wake up in a sewer surrounded by fish. Horny fish. You know what that means. Fish orgy. The stench draws in a bear. What do we do? We're gonna fight it. Bear fight. Bare handed. Bare, naked? Oh, yes please. We befriend the bear after we beat it in a brawl and ride it into a Chuck… Read more

The run for life and death Hi, I’m ava and I was in school at the time of the outbreak. You see, I'm at a success school. It's pretty much an alternative school for me and about 300 other people. Counting teachers, janitors, housekeeping, and students. Now to remind you this is a “school” so there's a lot of kids here, both boys and girls Attend this school and like any other school my school didn’t allow electronics… Read more

"When you have a dream, you've got to grab it and never let go Nothing is impossible There is nothing impossible to they who will try The bad news is time flies Life has got all those twists and turns Keep your face always toward the sunshine, and shadows will fall behind you.

I fucking hate Stuart Little. I know what you’re thinking, this is some funny joke, but no. Stuart Little is a piece of shit. fucking damn rat got picked over actual children at an orphanage and he’s supposed to be a hero? And I can’t even tell you how many damn times I’ve seen a great parking space only to turn the corner and realize Stuart Little is already parked there in his stupid tiny fucking convertible. He took my wife and the kids and my house and my job. I swear to fucking god.

SHREK

Written by

William Steig & Ted Elliott

SHREK Once upon a time there was a lovely princess. But she had an enchantment upon her of a fearful sort which could only be broken by love's first kiss. … Read more