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Explain Bear, why are you being so mean to me, like I haven't done anything with your big sexy ass, like I just wanna make out with you and that's all

You ever laying in your bed and get the sudden unescapable urge to jerk your body very violently?

my body hurts and the amount of times i got slapped on the ass just isn't even funny anymore

I know that no one will care but this is everything that i've written in my journal.

I've been told all of my life that all I do is ruin peoples lives and that all I am is a mistake and shit. I've been told I'm not good enough and that I have to kill myself to make everyone happier. Well guess what. I've fucking tried and tried so many times. I've been trying to keep fighting but what happens? I keep getting hu… Read more

Pretty crazy to watch the American government collapsing in real time like this.

I wish the internet existed the way it did in the early 2000s during the Soviet union. I'd love to read message boards describing what people thought 5-10 years before the whole thing broke down.

And then the aftermath of people picking at the corpse and becoming absurdly wealthy after scooping up those state assets.

Republicans have … Read more

Once upon a time, there was a girl named Lucy, who was known for one peculiar thing: she could not stop farting. It wasn’t just an occasional squeak or puff—it was a full-on symphony of noises, each more unpredictable than the last.

It all started one Saturday morning when Lucy was helping her mother bake cookies. As they mixed the dough, Lucy felt the pressure building. She tried to hold it in, but the more she foc… Read more

How come men get to be “short” and “fat” but women get to be “petite” and “curvy?”

Scripts.com Bee Movie By Jerry Seinfeld

NARRATOR: (Black screen with text; The sound of buzzing bees can be heard) According to all known laws of aviation, : there is no way a bee should be able to fly. : Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. : The bee, of course, flies anyway : because bees don't care what humans think is impossible. BARRY BENSON: (Barry is picking out a shirt) Yell… Read more

Bro im so angry at my body cause sometimes when i fart it's boiling hot and it hurts so bad and it always smells like eggs 😿