New Canning Jokes - Page 47 - Worst Jokes Ever

Nuns be like: Can I spread the word, but check for you?

How much curry can an Indian eat? Until his red dot explodes.

Q: Why can emos wear dog collars at school, but people can't wear hats? WTF school!

Me: Can I get your mom's number?

Friend: Here you go:

Me: Ohh, strange, I already had it.

What type of cake can orphans not eat? Homemade.

What type of deer can jump higher than a house?

All houses can't jump.

What type of horse can jump higher than a house?

All houses can't jump.

Why can't orphans ever be criminals?

He is not wanted.

The pastor sees little Johnny sitting on the church steps. Little Johnny is fixated on something. The pastor looks closer and sees that Johnny is stirring up something in an old coffee can. He says, "What you got there little Johnny?"

"This here is turpentine, the most POWERFUL liquid in the world!", says Johnny.

The pastor shakes his head, sits down next to Johnny, and says, "Now you know that's not true, son. Holy water is the most powerful liquid in the world. One drop of holy water on a pregnant woman's stomach and the next morning she'll pass a baby boy."

Little Johnny says, "Well that may be true, but one drop of this on a cat's ass and he'll pass a motorcycle!"

What do orphans go to church for?

So they can call someone "father."

(Pick-up line) If your tits are the Twin Towers... can I be your Osama?

How do you know an abo robbed your house?

The bins (trash cans) are empty and the dog is pregnant.

Why can't a Leicester fan pull girls? He can only do the fox trot.

How many black people does it take to change a lightbulb in the middle of the night?

I don't know, I can never see them.

If you call the number 800-273-8500 in Afghanistan, they say, "Can you fly a plane?"

Y'all are so rude on here. If you don't like what I put on MY profile, you can click your rude ass off of my profile and look at some other fucking jokes. DO NOT INTERACT WITH ME IF YOU HAVE SOMETHING RUDE TO SAY ABOUT ME!