What plate goes to Bikini Bottom?
Malaysia Flight 370.
Shower thoughts
What do you call a fat chick with a rape whistle?
Optimistic.
All countries will get Covid.
Except China, they got it right off the bat.
What is the difference between me and Paul Walker?
I’ve watched Fast and Furious Seven.
What did the autistic kid say to his girlfriend after they broke up?
"I thought what we had was special!"
What’s something Bill Cosby and Freddy Krueger have in common?
Once you fall asleep, you’re fucked.
Life is like a bag of jellybeans.
Nobody likes the black ones.
What do you call a black person in a dark room? Invisible
Why do gay men hate periods?
They prefer Collins.
What do you call a Chinese assassin?
Chinese takeout.
What do you call a fart in a gay bar?
A mating call.
Why do blonde prostitutes prefer blowjobs?
They hate it when you hand it to them.
I’m not calling you a slut, I’m calling you a penny.
Two-faced, worthless, and in everyone’s pants!
What is Pink Floyd in Princess Diana have in common Their last big hit was the wall
For a golfer, Tiger Woods isn't very good of a driver.
You can find perfectly cooked Kobe in a Japanese restaurant, but you can only find burnt Kobe in Calabasas.
What’s something you can say at the funeral but also in bed?
"Damn, that's really stiff!"
What’s something you can say in bed and in a Zoom meeting?
"Do you want the cameras on or off?"
What do you white people use as pronouns? Crack/her
What do you call a white woman working at an all black company?
Crack/her