Worst Jokes Ever
What happens when a clock is hungry?
It goes back four seconds.
One day a boy asks his grandfather for some money, and the grandpa says, “Well, can your dick touch your asshole?” To which the boy replied, “No.” So the grandpa says, “Okay,” and leaves it at that and walks off.
A few years later, the boy asks his grandfather for some money again, and his grandfather once again asks, “Can your dick touch your asshole?” To which the boy proudly says, “Yes, it can.” To which the grandpa says, “Good, now go fuck yourself.”
What gang was Stephen Hawking in? The Crips.
Leave a like down below if you think Stephen Hawking should stand for the National Anthem.
Donald Trump was golfing with Barack Obama. The Donald said, "Listen Barack, I'm getting older and I'm having trouble sexually satisfying my young wife. I know that you black guys are supposed to be magic in bed. Can you give me a few pointers?" Barack gave Donald a few ideas and that night Donald made love to his wife. He did everything he was told. He started out slowly entering his wife gently then finished hard. Melania came quickly screaming. "Oh Donald, You fuck just like Barack Obama."
What do you call a gay dinosaur? Megasoreass.
A woman ran into a police station screaming, "Help, I have been graped!" The policeman said, "Do you mean raped?" The woman said, "No, there was a bunch of them!"
Why is it that when Donald Trump and Melania make love, she is always on top?
Donald Trump can only F@#k up.
God's racist. He separated light from dark.
I've been looking for my ex-girlfriend's killer for the past two years.
But no one would do it.
What's the difference between Stephen Hawking and a baby?
Both of their legs don't work.
A woman noticed her husband standing on a bathroom scale, sucking in his stomach. "Ha! That's not going to help!" she said. "Sure it does," he said. "It's the only way I can see the numbers."
Yo mama is so fat, it took Nationwide 15 years to get on her side.
Why did Susie fall off the swing?
Because she didn't have any arms.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Not Susie.
What's black and white and red all over?
A massacre at a funeral.
RIP Stephen Hawking who was buried today... he did always love black holes.
I guess you could say Stephen Hawking is a dead meme.
What's the best thing about dead baby jokes?
They never grow old.
What do you call a disabled Asian?
Sum Ting Wong.
Why aren't koalas actual bears?
Because they don't meet the koalafications.