Why were the people during 9/11 mad because they ordered pepperoni sandwiches, but they got two planes?
Worst Jokes Ever
My dad is like the female wage gap: nonexistent.
What’s a sheep’s favorite song?
"Baby Don’t Herd Me."
What’s the difference between prison and concentration camps?
At least you don’t die when you shower.
Did you hear about the book about gravity? I couldn’t put it down.
"Let girls live" is 9 years old, OMG, right?
Why did Greg go mad? Because Stephen stalked him.
Today I saw my son lick out a tub of butter. I told him to make a sandwich without butter for a week (as a punishment). He said, "Okay," and licked the bread. "It's really easy to spread," he said. LOL!
What did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the other side. 😂😂😂
Women are like dogs...
"Where are you going? Where are you going? Where are you going?"
"Can I come? Can I come? Can I come?"
"I'll wait right here... I'll wait right here... I'll wait right here..."
SHOES
Race car backwards is race car.
Race car sideways is how Paul Walker died.
What do you call a cow with a twitch?
Beef jerky.
I would make a joke about your sister, but she banged me.
Where did Sally go during the bombing? Everywhere.
Your mama is so fat that when she was playing online, she crashed the whole server.
What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence?
Time to get a new fence!
What do you get when you cross a stick and a dog? A run away joke...
I don't have luck with other angels.
So I just WING IT!
Why is my pee pee 2 inches in length but 5 in girth?
Why didn't the squirrel want to go swimming? Because he didn't want to get his nuts wet!
What's 10 inches and makes women scream?
Cot death!