Worst Jokes Ever
Why are there no women in the NFL?
Commissioner Roger Goodell firmly believes in equal opportunity, so the girl tries out. Then, if she makes the team, we gangbang her to death. I mean, could you imagine what a scary birch she'd have to be?
@shelby denver is a massive nonce.
So I walk into Orchids Of Asia. I come out three minutes later with the best massage of my life. What's the catch? Aye, there, matey, the catch of the day be crabs.
What comes next in the pattern: ottffs?
A mom says to her son: "Hey, can you wave to that deaf kid over there?"
The son: "I don't know, can I?"
The mom: "May you?"
The son: "No, I don't have any arms!"
Roses are blood red, violets are twilight-hued oh how I wish I was dead so that I no longer have to brood.
Death would be a reprieve as I would no longer have to be true, and I would no longer have to be around any of you.
Why do flamingos sleep with one leg up?
Because if they slept with both legs up, they would fall over!
What do you call the only Trump Supporter to follow his orders to obstruct justice?
Answer: Attorney General William Barr!
What do you call a skeleton's omelet?
A bonelet.
Jokes...
What do you get when you have 10 chicken nuggets and little Jimmy tries to take one?
10 chicken nuggets and a dead little Jimmy.
Why is the sun so attractive? Because it is burning hot!
What’s better than swinging a dead baby in circles over your head with a 5 foot rope?
Stopping it with a shovel.
Did you know that Helen Keller has a swing in her backyard?
Neither did she.
Q: What was Hellen Keller's favorite game as a kid?
A: Musical chairs.
What is the best way to end a cookbook?
And that’s a wrap!
I'd tell you a joke about pizza, but it's too cheesy.
I heard an unusual word the other day: "Opaque."
Unfortunately, what it means is unclear.
In Mario, it is called a Zoomba, but if it was real, it would be a boomba.
What do you call a dog with no legs?
It don't matter what you call it. It ain't coming.