Worst Jokes Ever
Why can't a T-Rex clap?
He's dead.
Why did Sally fall off the swing?
She has no arms.
How do you fit 53 babies into a box?
First get a blender...
A pregnant woman enters the hospital with her concerned husband. As she goes into labor, a group of doctors asked him if he would like to try a device that transfers your spouse's pain to the father's nervous system.
He agrees and the doctors turn the dial on the device to 10%. Strangely, the man felt little pain. They continued to adjust the dial until it stopped at 100%, yet the man felt nothing. Later on, the wife had delivered the baby and the pair left the hospital with a healthy baby only to find the milkman laying on their stairs with a puddle of blood around his head, shaking uncontrollably.
What did the skeleton say to the other? "Wow, that song, 'Spooky Scary Skeletons,' really does send chills down my spine!"
I don't know what to say.
John Cena once insulted Chuck Norris. That's why we can't see him anymore.
When your friend gets involved with someone, it affects the friendship. Whenever a friend of mine has a new girlfriend, we should say I looked like the person you used to know, but I've been modified to survive in this relationship. If we have an argument and she's there, I might disagree with you; I'd rather continue to see her naked.
Why was the sheep arrested?
Because he did a "ewe" turn on a motorway.
Ur mum gay.
I'd make a farming joke, but I'm just a little less than corny enough.
Why did Princess Diana cross the road?
She wasn’t wearing her seatbelt.
Did you know Princess Diana had dandruff? They found her head and shoulders all over the windshield.
Did you hear about the four foot tall psychic who escaped prison?
He's a small medium at large.
Why did the cow jump over the moon?
Because the farmer had cold hands!
Jesus Christ does exist, he does, and he is the son of God... a God that doesn't exist XD
My girlfriend passed away recently.
At the funeral, everyone was shocked about it.
Still, even when dead, she is the best shag I've ever known.
O Dario tem namorada?
When you see an "Autistic child zone" sign and say, "Oh! That wasn't a dog."
Small People.
Last time I talked to my girlfriend, she was yelling at me to put the hammer down.