Worst Jokes Ever
What is 14 inches long and starts with D?
A Dookie From GREEN DAY
How did they know the teacher onboard the spaceship had dandruff?
Cause her Head and Shoulders were everywhere!
What did the math teacher write on his party invitations?
Be there or B2.
When my dad once went to the Virgin Islands, now it's just called the Islands.
I went on a date last night and told my date I worked with animals every day.
She said, "Oh, how sweet. What do you do?" I said, "I'm a butcher."
I ran into a dwarf, and he said, “Well, I’m not happy.”
Me: Then which one are you?
Eggshausted.
Why did the Chicken cross the road? You: Why? To get to the little b***h's house!
Knock knock! You: Who's there? The chicken!
What do you do when you hear your wife squirming around in the back yard?
Reload... chhchhhh.
A dad asked his son what kind of cake he wanted for his birthday, and he replied, "How about a urinal cake?!"
A man takes his dog out and steps in shit. He exclaims "WHAT THE DEUCE!"
Ryan.
Why did the vegetable go to jail?
He kaled a man and stole a 9-carat gold bar.
I was taking a walk near the prison when I saw a good looking guy climbing down the fence, and when he noticed me, he gave me a sneer! It was pretty condescending.
I'll pat your breasts, pat your breasts, cos I'm a baker's man, and you better bring me an orgasm as fast as you can. I'll pat you, and prick you, and mark you with my "D", And then throw you in the fire cos you're now worthless to me!
What's black and white and hard as nails? A nun on speed!
How do you make a juggler laugh? You tickle his balls.
Knock knock. Who's there? Not your parents.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Stranger.
Stranger who?
Stranger, why are you in my house masticating my apparent dead wife?
Kenny's dick is so small that instead of giving him a handjob, I gave him a thumb and forefinger job.