Worst Jokes Ever
Three men were in a desert. One man was holding a jug, the 2nd was holding a paper bag, and the last was holding a car door. A man came around and asked the 1st why he had a jug. He said it was his water and if he got thirsty, he would take a drink.
Then he asked the second why do you have a paper bag? The guy said this is my packed lunch, so if I get hungry, I will eat my lunch.
Then he asked the last man why he has a car door and he said if he got hot he would roll down the window.
My version of the Roses are Red Poem in MW3:
I thought Soap could trust you. And so did I too. So WHY IN BLOODY HELL DOES MAKAROV KNOW YOU?!
Jake had sex and broke her hymen, guess he’s Jake the ripper.
Why can orphans type? Because they can’t find the home row.
Why do lawyers use Viagra? To grow taller.
My dog died.
Three Nazis walk into a bar.
How do you stop a dog from humping your leg?
Pick him up and sick his dick.
What animal lies? A lion.
How can you tell an anti-vaccine kid?
It's only got 10 hours to live.
What is the sun's favorite chocolate bar?
A Milky Way 😱
What was Beethoven's favorite insect?
The bee! :0
Why was Sally sad?
Because she couldn't play pattycake. Sally doesn't have arms.
I remember my uncle's last words:
"I don't think we're going shooting today."
What does an apple and a gay person have in common?
Both fruits hang in trees out in the Middle East.
Yo mama so fat it took Nationwide three years to get on her good side.
Why did the mushroom kill himself?
Because he had a mushy life.
My peepee small.
Why did Karen leave me?
Because I was a mushroom.
Where did the mushroom kill himself?
In the mushroom.
Yo mama so fat, she fell in love with a skinny dude and tried to hug him but crushed him.