Why is he sooo dam fineee?
Worst Jokes Ever
I bet a disabled kid on a wheelchair that if he could catch me, I'd give him 1000 dollars. He said deal, and I went upstairs.
Hellen Keller walked into a bar... then a table... then a chair.
What's the worst thing about committing suicide? You can only do it once.
What's the only regret you would have when you eventually kill yourself? It wasn't sooner.
Why were the Twin Towers upset? They ordered Domino's but got jets.
Why can’t Chinese people play cricket?
Because they ate all the bats!
How do emos compliment each other?
They say, "I like your cuts g."
What do you call a spaceman’s willy?
A Shuttlecock!
Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke some marrahwanah.
Jack got high, slapped her thigh, and then they had some fun.
Jill forgot to take her pills, and now they have a son.
Little Johnny runs up to his mother and says, "Mommy, mommy, the other day I was playing with my ball upstairs and my ball got away and into your closet, and when I went to get it, daddy came in with the lady next door and they started hugging and kissing and the lady next door took off daddy's clothes and daddy took off the clothes from the lady next door, and they both got into your bed, and the lady next door got on top of daddy and started...". The mother cuts him off and says "Just stop right there. You wait until your daddy comes home so you can tell him everything you just told me." Couple hours later the father arrives and walks through the door to find his wife and child with bags packed. She walks up to him and slaps across the face shouting "I'm leaving you... Go ahead Johnny, tell him what you told me earlier." Johnny steps forward to tell his daddy. "Daddy, the other day I was playing with my ball upstairs and my ball got away and into your closet, and when I went to get it, you came in with the lady next door and you both started hugging and kissing and the lady next door took off your clothes and you took off the clothes from the lady next door, and you both got into your bed, and the lady next door got on top of you and started doing the same thing mom did with uncle Joe last summer."
My blind friend is so annoying, he kept bumping into things even though I repeatedly told him to look where he was going.
What is red and white and goes 200 mph?
A baby in a blender.
One Erection would be a very nice name for a gay band.
Would you like to eat some African food?
So would they...
Yo mama so ugly, she went to the bathroom and scared the sh*t out of the toilet.
Guys, we should stop making jokes about orphans. Their parents will get mad. Oh.... Wait... Continue.
Your mum sat on a phone, and she turned it into a pancake.
Q: How do you know there’s a party at Neverland Ranch? A: All the Big Wheels are parked out front.
Q: When do you know it’s over? A: Only one is left.
Sorry, I don't have a joke here... Just wondering how idiots end up here complaining about offensive jokes when you ended up here. You had to click that section on purpose, right? If you can't take it, piss the fuck off... If I'd be gay and I'd look up gay jokes and get offended... how stupid is that?
What did the terrorist think to himself seconds before hitting the tower?
"Did I leave the stove on?"
