how did stephen hawking die he lost internet connection

How ISS greets their friend. You the BOMB

why did your mum touch me because she was a pedo

A man dies, and his friend is invited to his funeral. This friend asks his wife "Can I say a word?" “Of course” she says. The man stands up and says "Plethora" The man’s wife says “Thanks, it means a lot”

We should enjoy the present while it’s here. Do you know why they call it the present? Because it’s a gift.

How do you make antifreeze You steal her blanket

your momma so fat when she stepped on the weighing scales her phone number came up!

What’s the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Porsche

I don’t have a Porsche in garage

Why did Susan drop her ice cream? She was hit by a bus

MY LIFE

A programmer pushes a stroller through the park. An elderly couple comes along: “Is it a boy or a girl?” The programmer replies, “Yes.”

sayo-nara

As a Jew was dying, he asked to join the communist party. The representative eagerly ran forward, and the Jew signed up. The he said, " Today, one more communist will die."

What do gay horses eat?

Hay.

Why don’t the Amish water ski?

The horses would drown.

What happens if a Asian walks into a wall with a boner. They hit there nose on the wall

Your mum is so fat Les Dawson would agree with me that when she passes her handbag from hand to hand she throws it.

Why did the girl fall off the swing … because she had no arms or legs

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas?

Cancer.

Why do they never serve beer at a math party? - Because you can’t drink and derive.