Worst Jokes Ever
Why are Captain from SpongeBob and Michael Jackson so similar?
They both say, "Are you ready, kids?"
What's similar between a priest and McDonald's?
They both shove their meat in between 10 year old buns.
Me: I got kicked out of the library the other day.
Friend: Why?
Me: Because I put the women rights book in the fiction section.
What's black and white, black and white, black and white, black and white...? A dead nun rolling down a hill.
Tails: Hey, Sonic, do you need payback? Oh, you are not a fat hedgehog, you are a snail.
Sonic: But I'm a fat snail because Dr. Eggman turned me into a snail.
Tails: I don't trust you, fat snail.
Are you suicide? Cause I'm tryna commit to you.
I hate when people make jokes about the Twin Towers.
My dad died on 9/11. He was a great pilot.
I saw a guy beat his girlfriend to a pulp after his girlfriend threw a phone in his face. I offered to call an ambulance, but he said he was fine.
A woman went out on a date and said, “I’m thirty-one with the body of a sixteen-year-old.” The man responded, “Wanna show me? 😏” The woman took him back to her house and opened her freezer and said, “Take a look.”
Why can't Michael Jackson play baseball?
He made a hit and run!
Is it okay to call a special ed kid late to class a little tardy?
When does a joke become a dad joke? When it goes to get the milk yet never comes back.
Miss you dad.
"North America, best America."
You: Its nighttime, shouldn't we be heading to bed?
Boy Roommate: Ok, are you Top or Bottom?
You: Uhhhhhhh
Boy Roommate: No dumby, bunk beds.
You: Thank God.
Boy Roommate: But if you wanna, we can...
You: *faints*
Ratio.
Ok, there has to be SOMEONE on this website right now. Whoever that is, wanna chat? (I'm just bored)
What type of camp does a kid with ADHD go to?
Concentration camp.
What did the Mexican firefighter name his two sons?
Jose and Hose B.
Me: Calls 9-1-1.
Operator: 9/11, what’s your emergency?
Me: *hangs up*
What’s the opposite of an exorcism?
It’s when Satan has to tell the priest to come out of the child.