Wishful Thinking jokes

Guys, say "I love gape horn" really loud and you will get good luck for 10 years.

When you die, people cry and wish you to come back.

But when you do, people scream and run away.

I wish I could be as visible as my depression is.

I wish my grass was emo, then it would cut itself.

Sometimes I just wake up in the morning, and think, "Well, better luck next time."

My teacher gave us an assignment, and one of the questions was "What do you want to be when you grow up?"

I answered, "Happy."

The teacher said I didn't understand the test. I said to her that she didn't understand life.