Their jokes
Friend 1: Did you?
Depressed friend 2: I didn't!
Friend one: Swear on your life!
Depressed friend 2: I swear.
A week later friend 2 dropped dead to their utter delight.
How to respond if someone starts looking at the photos on your phone.
Step 1: Jab your thumbs into their eye sockets.
Do depressed people hate swimming?
They hate it because they are already drowning in their depression, but they love it because it might make all their dreams come true.
If you're ever bored, just punch an orphan, because what are they gonna do, tell their parents?
If you’re ever bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do, tell their parents?
Why do orphans hate the color black? Because it reminds them of their dark history.
If you’re ever bored, punch an orphan.
What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
What do blind people and an orphan have in common? Both can't see their parents.
Q. What do rape victims miss?
A. Part of their brain.
Why is it OK to hit an orphan?
Because they can’t tell their parents.
Why are orphans so bad at baseball?
Because they can’t find their way home.
Why are orphans so naughty at school? It's not like the teacher is gonna call their parents.
The phrase “Muslim women live in one of the hottest countries in the world and they can’t even expose their legs” has two meanings.
What is the difference between a priest and McDonald's? Nothing, they both stick their meat in between 12-year-old buns.
What is a similarity between priests and doctors?
They both have fetishes for their professions.
What do priests and McDonald's have in common?
They both stick their meat in 10-year-old buns!
Why don't catholic kids lose their virginity in their 20's?
Because they lost it to a priest when they were 5
Punch an orphan, what are they gonna do: tell their parents?
If you're bored, punch an orphan, what are they gonna do, tell their parents?
Even if orphans fail their exams, I'm sure their parents wouldn't...
Oh wait...