Their jokes
You know, when women clean their nails with chemicals, no one cares, but when Hitler tries to clean Poland with chemicals, everyone goes crazy.
How do Asians name their kids?
They throw pots and pans down the stairs. (ching chong dong)
How does the sea say hello?
It WAVES you.
SEA what I did there?
I'm SHORE you saw it.
Don't be SALTY!
Why do ducks have feathers?
To cover their butt, quack!
A horse, a fox, and a bunny join together and make a rock band. They started doing tiny gigs, but they got famous and went on tour. They all got so famous it went to their heads, and the band disbanded. The fox made his, and the bunny made her own. The horse was sad that the band was no more, so he went to a bar, and the bartender asked why the long face?
The Columbine High School basketball team hasn't been the same since they lost their two best shooters.
You know, I got a SKELETON of these jokes. All are HUMERUS. Yeah, this gets under people’s SKIN, but I guess you could call their FUNNY BONE BROKEN! People try and hit me when this happens, luckily, I got THICK SKIN! Yeah, thanks for listening. Hope you got these puns down TO THE BONE!
What do inner city schools and databases have in common?
Their problems are usually caused by a race condition.
Why do Pirates say "Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!"?
First time out at sea, they prepare for battle and say to their commander:
"The canons be ready, Captain!"
"Are," says the Captain (correcting their grammar).
"Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!" they all exclaimed!
Why did the family move away?
Because they lost their son.
I went trick or treating this year with friends. Good thing I dressed as a zombie...
no one could tell that it was their blood.
Two of my grandpas died in WW2.
Their tower fell over.
Why can't dinosaurs clap?
Because they're dead.
What do McDonald's and a priest have in common? They both stick their meat in 10-year-old buns.
What is the difference between a school bully and a feminist?
The school bully does not hide behind their computer screen.
What does Michael Jackson and a Playstation have in common?
They're both made of plastic and children turn them on.
Two mums hook up!
Their daughter comes in the room and says, "Which one's the baby daddy?"
The "mum" points to the woman who was actually a man!
Who do Chinese people name their kids?
Throw the forks and knives down the stairs.
"Banjo players spend half their lives tuning... and the other half out of tune."
I'm a banjo picker, and I can confirm this is 99% true.
Come on guys, it's not nice to make fun of autism. I mean really, the Riot devs try their best, but just because they have autism does not mean you can make fun of them. Make fun of them for something else, like their Down syndrome.