The jokes
I can't believe the suicide hotline put my cousin on hold. They left him hanging.
I was beefing with a dude in a wheelchair, so I took his wheelchair and threw it across the street and told him, "Walk it off, you will be fine."
Why do orphans play tennis?
Because it's the only love they get.
What do you call a chomo on the road? Roadkill.
Why did the wetback cross the river? To get to the US.
How did the blind boy's parents punish him?
Rearrange the furniture.
Poop and balls through the walls!
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To cut through traffic.
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple?
Apples get picked.
The Twin Towers ordered pepperoni pizza, but got plane.
What will fall faster, an emo or an apple?
An apple, because the emo would get caught on the rope.
Ur mom is so fat that when she came to the front door, she was already at the back door.
What is the difference between an orphan and a phone?
A phone has a home button.
Why did the orphan cheat on his girlfriend with a guy?
Because he wanted someone to call "Mommy" and "Daddy."
Why did Jeffrey eat all the ice cream in one sitting?
To make room in the freezer for his special meat.
Why did the pervert cross the road?
'Cause he was stuck to the chicken.
Yo mama so fat, when she was just there, she made the whole earth go back to the ice age!
What's blue and bad for your teeth?
A green brick that's painted blue after the original paint dries (it takes a little while to dry), but after it dries you can paint it and then it will be green. If the brick is green it is called a green brick as it is green (not blue anymore) and it hurts your teeth because brick is a hard material that can damage the bones in your mouth (also known as your teeth).
Did you know the Titanic swimming pool is still full?
You can sink the Titanic like you can drive a bike. Not a joke.