The jokes

What did the girl and the orphan have in common? Their parents weren't home.

What is the difference between an orphan and a non-orphan? You can slap the orphan, but not the non-orphan because they can actually tell their parents.

Your mini pecker is so small, the taxi driver said the ride was so short that he'd do it for free.

You know, it was so cold in D.C. the other day, I saw a politician with his hands in his own pockets.

What did the hurricane say to the coconut tree?

Hold on to your nuts; this ain’t no ordinary blow job.

Why did the orphan go to the monkey exhibit?

To see his closest relatives.

Yo mom's so fat, I went over to her house a few years ago and wanted to watch TV.

So I asked for the TV remote, and she's still trying to get it!

If you are depressed, eat Panera Bread. It is so yummy yum yyum yum yum yum.

Feliz Navidad Feliz Navidad Feliz Navidad Prospero Ano y Felicidad.

Feliz Navidad Feliz Navidad Feliz Navidad Prospero Ano y Felicidad.

I wanna wish you a Merry Christmas I wanna wish you a Merry Christmas I wanna wish you a Merry Christmas From the bottom of my heart.

I wanted to open a brothel in the monastery, but the slogan: "Fist some Christs" was, unfortunately, not so well received.

Why can't people in wheelchairs be gay? Cuz you can't be a fruit and a vegetable at the same time.