The jokes

How do you disappoint people in Africa?

Send a message saying that you’re going to send trucks full of food, water, and clothing.

But don’t follow through and send the trucks empty.

"Yo mama's so fat that when she farts, Al Gore accuses her of global warming."

Yo mama's so old, she was a waitress at the Last Supper.

Yo mama's so fat, she was overthrown by a small militia group, and now she's known as the Republic of Yo Mama.

Yo mama's so stupid, she climbed over a glass wall to see what was on the other side.

Yo mama's so dumb, she trips over the wireless internet.

What’s the best air to breathe if you want to be rich? Millionaire.

What sits on the seabed and has anxiety? A nervous wreck.

Did you hear about the woman who couldn't stop collecting magazines? She had issues.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?"

Did you hear about the broken guitar for sale?

It comes with no strings attached.

Did you hear about the bossy man at the bar? He ordered everyone around.

What's a pirate's favorite letter? You'd think it's the "R," but it's really the "C."

What do you give the dentist of the year? A little plaque.

Why did the computer go to bed?

It needed to crash.

What did the earthquake say when it was done? Sorry, my fault!

Why did the computer catch cold?

It left a window open.

What did one volcano say to the other? I lava you.

Did you hear about the cat that ate a lemon? Now it's a sourpuss.

Did you hear about the guy who drank invisible ink? He's at the hospital waiting to be seen.