The jokes
What happened to Stephen Hawking after he reached Heaven?
Nothing yet. He is still struggling to get up the stairway to Heaven.
What’s the difference between a zit and a priest? The zit waits 'til you're 12 to cum on your face.
What did the Indian say to the fat man?
"Curry up!"
What did the one-handed man have for breakfast this morning?
Finger food.
Why did the zebra cross the road?
Why did the Oreo go to the dentist?
🎉🎇🎊🎆🎈
Have you heard of the... uh Pokemon called uh rhy... rhy... Rhydon deez nuts?
How did Helen Keller's parents punish her?
By rearranging the furniture.
I got a heart pain then I went to [the] hospital. When the doctor says I am dead, but I run then I jump. I am not dead!
What’s the definition of a pedophile, Tyler?
What's the difference between an American 12-year-old and an African 12-year-old? About 40 pounds.
What's the difference between sand and food? Africans have plenty of sand.
What's the difference between a dick and a cannon?
Your dick shots longer.
Someone handed me a knife the other day and told me that it was very smart.
I made sure it didn't outsmart me.
You're so damn fat that the only belt that fits you is an asteroid belt.
Where do dogs go when their tails fall off?
To the retail store.
How do you call a cop?
Through the phone.
(My puns are bad)
Why did the turkey suck my bacon? Because it wanted cum in its mouth.
I'll stop with the horrible puns if you can say a good joke.
My diet:
Make all of my friends cupcakes. The fatter they get, the thinner I look...