Sympathy jokes

I'm sorry and I apologize mean the same thing, except at a funeral.

We wrote letters to a kid with cancer.

My letter read, "It's a bumpy road, but soon you will have a straight path."

People didn't realize it was meant for his heart monitor.

An orphan boy at my school did really bad in a test and started crying.

I said, “Don’t worry, your parents won’t say anything.”

My friend’s mother was never a font of sympathy, but always the one to see beyond the darkness.

Upon learning about her daughter’s cancer diagnosis she said, “Well honey, at least you’ll lose some weight!”

I once went up to an orphan and they were crying, and I asked where their parents are, and they started crying more.

Mom died, so I planted mums and forget-me-nots all over her grave site.

Imagine saying "my bad" instead of "sorry for your loss" at a funeral.

My crush: OMG, my dog just died!😭😭😭😭😭

Me: Oh my goodness, I am so sorry. I am here for you!

My crush: I have a boyfriend...🙄

Me: Yeah well, I have a dog.

Sorry to hear you feel like poo!

Nobody: Aww, that's so sad!

Me: Just like me.

You aren't alone. If you ever need to chat, I'm here. From one person to another. I hate this condition. I wish we didn't struggle.

I asked for emotional support. They handed me a mirror and said, "Talk to someone who cares."

Let's chat here, sisters!

Kariah, blue heart!

Lariah, pink heart!

Iariah, yellow heart!

Me, green heart!

I'm sorry for your loss.

It is going tibia okay.

Hi, you guys don't know me, but I have my best interests at heart.

I'm a kind person who wants to put a stop to the bullying. I think that Gwen, Addison Banks, Watersharky, ect. are kind people! Also, I kinda like Watersharky...

When a family friend passed away, my granddaughter took her three-year-old son to visit the widow. As they approached the front door, she whispered to the boy, “Make sure to tell her how sorry you are.”

He whispered back, “Why? I didn’t kill him.”

In the new Grinch, the Whos would say he stole Christmas, "Get him!" Then the Grinch said, "I'm an orphan!" That changes everything. The Whos said, "What would they do if Max was an orphan?"

So I went to my friend's funeral today. As we were all leaving, a kid put a "get well soon" card next to my friend's grave. 'Poor kid'.

"I'm sorry" and "I apologize" mean the same thing, except at a funeral.