SOS jokes

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This one butt cheek said to the other one, "It's really personal, but it's okay, I'll tell you." It said, "Hey, let's go to my crib so we can smoke a little joint, watch a movie, and go upstairs in the room and get down."

If your butt hurts real bad, put some vapor rub and booty cream on it so it can heal back to normal.

What do you tell your butt cheek when you need to use the bathroom? "Hold it in, so you won't get constipated and die."

So my sister was eating Now&Laters, and I continuously heard smacking sounds. So I told her, "Can you stop smacking? It's annoying." Then she said, "I can't, it's a juicy type of candy." So I said, "I can stop the candies from making that sound." Then she said, "How?" So I smacked her. :)

Your classmate: You're so ugly.

Me: That's what your mom said when she had you and called you a mistake.

Little Johnny was playing with dick when his teacher walked in the room. She asked him what he was doing, he said Im doing my homework. The teacher saw how big his cock was and asked him to have sex with her. He willingly did so. Little johnny was already 25 so it didn't matter. The only thing was that he was homeschooled.

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    • Bubba couldn't make rent, so he offered to sleep with the landlady instead.

    I think he forgot he lived in his mom's basement.

    What do you call a man who likes rape jokes?

    A fucking disgusting scumbag with no intelligence whatsoever. If you actually joke about this, you are the reason humanity has faded.

    Your hairline is so bad, when you look in the mirror, your hairline looks like an endangered species.

    I found a child on the street homeless, and they were really nice, so I took them home. Then I said, "Who's better, Biden or Trump?" They said they support Trump. They are now dead in my basement and have been for 3 years.

    So a girl goes to Santa in the mall, and Santa asks what she would like for Christmas. So the kid says: “a little sister”. So then Santa says: “bring me your mother!”

    Yo mama is so fat that she is not wrong when she says the world revolves around her.

    What did they do with Michael Jackson when he died?

    They melted him down and turned him into Lego, so kids could play with him for once.

    One morning, Peppy and George came downstairs for breakfast, but they got a plate of juicy bacon. Their dad had recently gone missing, so they ate it quite sadly.

    The next morning, they went to school and asked their teacher, "What is bacon made out of?" The teacher replied, "Pigs, why?" Peppa and George looked horrified.