Richards

Richards jokes

Plane

  • Tonight, on Top Gear!

    James May dives a bus full of kids off a mountain!

    Richard Hammond starts WW3 in Germany!

    And I fly a plane into the World Trade Center!

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    Chef

  • A chef named his chicken Richard and named a rooster Ballz. A guy walks up and asks the chef what he's cooking. He replies, "My dick and balls."

    Idiot

  • RICK: GUESS WHAT GUESS WHAT OH GUESS WHAT MOTHERFUCKER OR IMMA SAY IT!!!!!!

    Richard: What????

    Rick: So before Donald Trump's impeachment, he said, "The Coronavirus will end on March 32nd 2021."

    Richard: Your from planet Earth where there's a March 32nd. Enjoy it, *stupid dumb fuck brother*.

    Rick: Oh I will.

    *It was the day March 21st*

    *9 Days later*

    *March 31st*

    Rick: oh I cant wait until tomorrow!!!!!!!!!! Ooh im so excited im gonna give my friends a big ole bro hug and hand shake i miss the muhfuckin dudes man

    *one day later*

    *He got his school uniform waiting for the bus not seeing it*

    Rick:....... wai......Huh!?!?...... hol....up

    BITCH IM AND IDIOT THERE IS NO MOTHERFUCKING MARCH 32ND THIS IS THE MOTHERFUCKING 1ST OF APRIL TRUMP DUMBASS

    *Richard*

    *oh he's the dumbass*

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    King

  • Alfred the Great was arguably the greatest king in England’s history.

    The worst? Richard the Goat Fucker.

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  • Clock

  • Why did the moron throw his clock out the window?

    The clocks reminded him of Richard Clock, the convict who knife-raped his wife.

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  • Gay

  • Richard: Mom, someone called me gay.

    Richard's mom: Why didn't you slap him across his face?

    Richard: No, I couldn't.

    Richard's mom: Why?

    Richard: Because he was cute.

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    Dick

  • My friend Richard is always bullying all the little kids in the neighborhood. He is such a dick.

    Clock

  • Why did Arnold throw his clock out of the window?

    It reminded him of Richard Clocks, a man convicted for knife raping his wife.