My neighbor has been mad at his wife for sunbathing nude. I personally am on the fence.
I reached into my pocket and pulled out a rectal thermometer and thought,
"Some asshole has my pen!"
What's the difference between an oral thermometer and a rectal thermometer?
The taste!
Someone asked me what the worst mistake you could make while being at work was, and I replied, "Being a doctor and mixing up the oral and rectal thermometers."
