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1) buy a lobster
[deleted] by
My friend is in forensics and works on crime
scenes. They find a woman laying on the
bathroom floor with a head wound and live
baby shrimp on the floor with a smell of burnt
residue. After 3 days of investigation, they
figured out what happened.
Long story short, she bought a lobster from
the market. In the market, they feed the
lobster live baby shrimp until they're sold. This
woman brings the lobster home, inserts the
lobster's tail into her vagina, lights a lighter
and puts the flame towards the lobster's head,
so the lobster will frantically start shaking his
tail (which is inside her vagina), giving her the
jollies. Apparently she killed the lobster from
burning his head too long, the lobster, being
dead, voids his bowels, causing this lobster to
shit live baby shrimp into her vagina. This
woman then goes to pee and sees live baby
shrimp crawling out of her vagina, she freaks
out, falls, and cracks her head open on the
bathtub and dies.
it happened in Chicago in 2001
?
---
14
1) wait for horny
Chicago 2001
"Lobster Love" Incident

Titanic

A tweet by Sarah Cooper says: Titanic (1997). Scientist: Where's the diamond? Old lady: *three hour long story about how she lost her virginity*

Divorce

A screenshot of a Google search result for "Mummy Pig" showing a cartoon pig, followed by text that details the pig's life as having 67 divorces, being in love with Lester from GTA 5, hacking Fortnite, and killing 417 people including Stephen Hawking.

Gender Stereotype

The image features a split screen. The top half shows a close-up of two animated alien characters, Stitch (blue) and Angel (pink) from the Disney movie Lilo & Stitch, kissing. The bottom half contains a text-based meme formatted as a conversation between a 'guy at disney' and a 'disney ceo'. The conversation sarcastically explains the stereotypical design choices made for Angel to signify her as female, specifically mentioning long antennae, mascara, a protruding chest, and the color pink.

Answer

who is she. wrong answers only

A full-body, digital drawing of a young girl with pink hair, green eyes, and black hair accessories. She is wearing a black and gold dress, white stockings and black shoes. Her hands are resting on her hips, and she has a subtle, closed-mouth smile. The background is solid black.

Memes

Dad: Do you wanna know what your sister said while she
lost her virginity?
Son: Dad, please stop this is inappropriate
Dad: Exactly

Pitbull

A close-up image of a monstrous-looking dog with large teeth and a harness on its face. The text overlaid on the bottom of the image reads: 'pitbull owners be like "her name is pancake and she's a sweetheart."'

Parody

A page from a journal entry, drawn in the style of 'Diary of a Wimpy Kid.' The narrator, Greg Heffley, writes about his brother Manny. A comic strip illustrates Manny asking for help to tie his shoes in baby talk ("I'm onwee thwee, bubby! Hewp me tie my gawddayum shoes."). Greg responds in a speech bubble ("DATS FOWR NAWT TEACHING ME HOW TWO TIE MY SHOES, YOU FUCKING PLOOPY."). Below, Greg is shown kicking Manny, who flies into a wall causing cracks. The text continues with a consequence from Mom, where she shoots Greg in both legs, breaking his kneecaps.

Belief

The top part of the image shows text on a tan fabric that says "She's broken because she believed" with the words "she" and "believed" in a different, more muted, color. The bottom part of the image says "No one:" and "Him:" above an image of a pot lid.

Minion

i'll be the minion on the right

The image shows two columns labeled "To Mom" and "To Dad". The "To Mom" column lists many common child complaints and requests. The "To Dad" column contains a single question: "Where's Mom?" Two minions are depicted in the "To Dad" column, looking confused.

Netflix

A still from a movie with two characters, a man and a woman looking surprised. The text reads: "When she wants Netflix and chill but the show is actually pretty good."

Year

when she feels 21 yrs old

A woman in a red coat and hat is exiting a car, appearing a bit clumsy. The text on the image is: "when she feels 21 yrs old".

Someone Else

When you think she likes someone else

A close-up of a stone statue's face, with a tear rolling down its cheek.

Hello Kitty

An image of a Hello Kitty figurine with red eyes and a blood-splattered knife. The text overlay reads: "In the day, she likes Hello Kitty. At night she drops the 'O'."

Bellatrix

Ew potter

The image shows two scenes. The first scene has an image of Harry Potter with a Bellatrix look alike kissing his head. The second shows what looks like a behind the scene where Bellatrix and another person sit at a table with lots of items on it. At the bottom, there is a text overlay: "Helena Bonham Carter said that her character Bellatrix was afraid of Harry because she couldn't understand how a 17 year old boy was able to overpower Lord Voldemort."

Woman

A woman is standing at the side of the road holding a cardboard sign. She is wearing an ankle monitor. The text on the image says: “The definition of oxymoron. She's homeless and on house arrest.”

Chica

sad

An image of the character Bonnie from Five Nights at Freddy's, looking sad with a cigarette in his mouth. The text on the image reads: "She was my chica until I found out she spent 5 nights at Freddy's."

Goo

real.

A man is wearing glasses with one lens that is fully black. Above the man is the text "Her: goo goo gaga"

Name

A still from a film with a man looking slightly perplexed above the text "When she wants me to open up but I already told her my full name and favorite color."

Brit

A newspaper clipping with the headline "Nude Brit covered in poo fell from hotel balcony into café", followed by a news article describing a naked British tourist who fell through a café ceiling from his hotel balcony in Thailand.

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