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Confession

Shitpost master-general · 3 months ago

A screenshot of a Twitter thread. The original post states, "if i had a dick i'd stack donuts on it". The reply begins by participating in the crude joke, saying, "Yeah I probably get 2 or 3 donuts ahaha," before abruptly transitioning into a detailed murder confession, providing the location (Sam Houston National Park 30.535993, -95.645309), depth (7.3 feet), and the victim's name and age (Josef Kalic, 34 years old), and the date of the crime (2006).

Apology

Shitpost master-general · 3 months ago

A screenshot of a YouTube comment thread. The user Ricardo Pineda asks how to make the audio his ringtone. The user Joaquin Amaya replies with an insult: "Dumb nigga." Ricardo Pineda then retaliates by posting geographic coordinates: "@Joaquin Amaya 38.8977° N, 77.0365° W this you??" Joaquin Amaya immediately apologizes: "@Ricardo Pineda I'm sorry."

Focus

Shitpost master-general · 3 months ago

An image of basketball star LeBron James looking extremely focused and intense, surrounded by digital flames and sparks. He is holding a basketball. Overlaid text says: "POV: when the choir hit a high note and the glass dildo breaks in my a$$ so I gotta lock in and pretend like nothing happened".

Tail

Shitpost master-general · 3 months ago

A screenshot of a Reddit post from the subreddit r/playboicarti. The post is titled "I think everyone wishes humans had tails". The body of the post describes a hypothetical scenario at Walmart where a mom compliments someone's hair. The author suggests that if humans had tails, they would wag involuntarily, revealing excitement and causing embarrassment when the 'mom' notices.

9/11

Heroin Monkey · 3 months ago

Meme stealing license

Siri_the_Robot · 4 months ago

Many have asked and I have provided

A blank identification card template with the header "Official Meme Stealing License". On the left, there is a square box for a photo. To the right of the photo box are fields for "Name:", "Gender:", "Joined:", "Occupation:", and "Level:". At the bottom left, it says "Valid Thru:". On the bottom right, it says "Membership Type:".

Funeral

Heroin Monkey · 4 months ago

A screenshot of a social media post featuring a video game landscape with text overlay that reads: "Yo bro no disrespect but if you go to my funeral I ain't going to yours". Below the video, the comment section is visible, showing a user named johnny asking "why" and another user named reapingraq pointing out that someone actually asked why.

Racism

K!ttyy · 4 months ago

Love the things I talk about

A screenshot of a messaging app conversation. One user asks, "why are you teaching me racial slurs?" and the other replies, "Why not". The first user then sends a string of messages: "cause im not racist", "i mean", "i do say the n word alot", "and make fun of mexicans", "and i really hate the yellow people", "and most jews suck", "but im not racist".

Woman

Shitpost master-general · 4 months ago

Women are so scary. Does anybody know what is wrong with them?

A screenshot of a 4chan thread featuring two anonymous posts. The first post includes a picture of a woman with distinct split black and white hair and dark makeup, along with the text: "i hate that i'm attracted to mentally ill woman." The second post, a reply, simply states: "All women are mentally ill."

Lingerie

Shitpost master-general · 4 months ago

A screenshot of an online comment section. The top comment by 'sissyslutforyouonly' reads: "I wore my mom's lingerie and got off to imagining my dad doing me (I'm not a girl)". A reply by 'dave_mustains_stolen_riff' features a black and white image of a war-weary soldier with a thousand-yard stare, looking intensely into the camera.

Cookie

Shitpost master-general · 4 months ago

Cookie theft is worse than hitler

A screenshot of a Reddit comment thread. User Aggravating_Drag705 writes, "i once stole a cookie from my sister". User Cultural-Proposal-34 replies, "worse than hitler".

Rabbit

Shitpost master-general · 4 months ago

Buy silver rn trust please I’m begging you buy silver ride it to the moon I swear

A fluffy rabbit sits in a small circular hole in the dirt. White text and arrows point to the rabbit as being "from the moon??" and the hole as an "impact crater".

Cat

Shitpost master-general · 4 months ago

A screenshot of a 4chan post featuring an image of an orange cat looking directly at the camera with a neutral expression. The text above the image states "this picture genuinely scares (...)". The text below the image describes the cat as uncanny and off-putting, suggesting it might be a person and comparing it to the smile.jpg creepypasta.

Puppy

K!ttyy · 4 months ago

reddit ts

Car

D34DL7 N!GHTSH4D3S · 4 months ago

..do i even need to explain ts..

A screenshot from a game, likely Roblox, showing a car with a full rainbow gradient paint job. A character with a smug face is driving. A speech bubble above the car says "why wont my car go straight".

Geopolitics

what’s dudeese · 4 months ago

A screenshot of an iMessage conversation. The timestamp says Today 4:39 PM. Messages on the left are accompanied by the flag of Venezuela and say, "we're short staffed for tonight" and "we could use some extra help". The first set of replies on the right are accompanied by the flag of Russia and say, "damn thats crazy" and "goodluck tho". The second set of replies on the right are accompanied by the flag of Iran and say, "yeah i bet" and "goodluck man".

History

what’s dudeese · 4 months ago

A photo of a laptop screen showing a college application form for the College of Arts & Sciences. The question asks "Discuss why you have chosen history as your major." In the text box, the user has typed "the little dark age edits". There is overlay text that says "i hope my admissions officer knows ball 💔 wish me luck ✌️".

Goku

Shitpost master-general · 4 months ago

I can’t believe I’ve never seen this before

An image of a grassy field with a small dollhouse. To the right is a tall, black, spiked creature with a distorted red face, which is circled in red with a red arrow pointing to it. On the left side, the character Goku from Dragon Ball Z is standing and looking on.

Promotion

Heroin Monkey · 4 months ago

A meme featuring a screenshot of actor Brad Pitt from the movie 'Meet Joe Black'. He is smiling warmly and sincerely at a woman who has her back to the camera. The text overlay reads: 'Me GENUINELY telling my wife I got promoted to assistant manager at KFC so she can finally quit her job as a brain surgeon'.

Foot

Creed (shit isnt availabe) · 4 months ago

The image contains text that says "Girl: I only date 6 feet guys" and "Me with 2 feet:". Below the text is a picture of a man sitting on the floor, looking sad. He is wearing a plaid shirt and blue sneakers.

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