Maltese jokes

What do you call a fat Indian sat on the floor?

A meatball/malteser.

Your forehead looks like the inside of a Malteser.

You have a head of a Malteser and a hairline VEGTA.

I got barred from Weight Watchers today.

It wasn't my fault; it was the fat ass next to me who spilled her box of Maltesers onto the floor in the middle of the room. All I did was say that it was the funniest game of Hungry Hungry Hippos that I have ever seen.

What do you call an Indian?

Person in red. Cart a pack of Maltesers.

Islamist guys and American Christian right-wing guys are both similar in that both abhor the existence of gay people, but only the Christian Right loves to eat sausages, especially the little ones, if you know what I mean...

I was raised a Catholic, and my priest told me when I was 12, "God is watching you when you masturbate."

I said, "Is God a pedophile too, Father?"

A mosquito with a Mario hat on flies on you saying, "It's-a me, Malario!"

What is the best Catholic dating app?

Grinder.

Them: You want some Lucky Harms?

Me: What are Lucky Harms?

Them: They're Lucky Charms, but instead of being magically delicious, they're magically malicious.