Canine jokes
If a tree could be any animal, what would it be?
Answer: A dog because of its bark lol. π
What has 8 legs and 2 ears? A dog.
Why was the dog staying in the shade?
Because it didn't want to be a hot dog!
What is a dog's favorite snack?
RUFFles.
The teacher called Little Johnny to her desk. She said: βThis essay youβve written about your pet dog is exactly the same essay your brother has written.β
βOf course it is,β said Johnny. βItβs the same dog.β
staring into the sun!
What time is it when you get home? Can you walk walk and a car and get home and get a walk home and get a dog π? Today is the night I can drive.
What has a dog?
People.
Q. What's a dog's favourite type of sex? A. Ruff.
What is a dog's favorite music?
Pup rock
I was reading a book about an immortal dog yesterday...
It was impossible to put down.
If a dog made a computer, it would have a mega bite.
What do you call a suspicious dog?
A sussy bark-er.
I met an orphan with a dog yesterday. I chose the dog.
What do dogs and lesbian women have in common?
They're both lickers and called a bitch.
If a dog is white with black spots, then it is 90% great and 10% guilty because it half way starts crimes and is a mistake to the world and is punished by the white dogs that are full white and not mixed colors.
So you know there's like dog mixes, right? Like a Snoodle and that stuff, right? So why can't a bulldog and a shih tzu be mixed? 'Cause if they did, it would be called bullshit.
Like if your best friend has a dog.
It's amazing how dog owners can make their dogs shout different things. For example, Czech dogs go "barf," American dogs go "woof," and Chinese dogs go "sizzle."
What do you call a dog with no legs?
Doesn't matter what you call him, he ain't comin'.
Where do you find a dog with no legs?
Where you left it.
