M&Ms jokes

Yo mama so dumb, she tried to put m&m's in alphabetical order.

Does Eminem like M\&M's? Cause if he didn't, that would be like "they're" not liking "there."

Guy: Why can't Jesus have M&M's?

Priest: Why?

Guy: Because they'll fall through the hole in his hands.

Why can't Jesus eat M&Ms?

Because they keep falling through the holes in his hands.

Why can't Jesus eat M&Ms?

They'll fall right through his hands.

I was walking to the store, and then this boy told me, "I'm an orphan and I have no money." He wanted M\&Ms. I gave him a family-sized bag.

Why do elephants paint their toes red, blue, green, orange, brown, and yellow?

So they can hide in a bag of M&Ms.

Three friends go to a water park and meet a genie. "You each get one wish." "When you get to the top of the slide, you shall scream your wish as you go down." The first man went down the slide and screamed "Coca Cola," and the pool was filled with Coca-Cola.

The next ugly-ass looking mf goes down the slide and screams "C-M&Ms" as if he wasn’t just about to say cum—then the pool was full of cu—I mean M&Ms. The last horny-ass bitch is so excited he says "Weee!" Then the pool is full of piss. He was upset the pool wasn’t full of dildos./j

I can measure the speed of an object, because I want to km/s.

Average Kid: brings mp3 to school.

Rich Kid: Brings mp4 to school.

Quiet Kid: Brings an mp5.

What happens when a clock is hungry?

It goes back four seconds.

A normal kid brings an MP3 to school.

A rich kid brings an MP4 to school.

A quiet kid brings an MP5.

Horror movies don't scare me. 5 missed calls from my mum scares me.