The general proofreading Hitler's speeches was the original Grammar Nazi
What's a rapper's favorite animal?
RHYMENOCEROS!
Asians love it when a British person says "Race!"
What do u call a lesbian dinosaur?
I like alottopuss.
What does an orphan's life and a pseudoword have in common?
They both have no meaning.
Johnny: Why do cuss words exist?
Mom: That's not something you should think about right now. I'll tell you when you're older.
|| 20 YEARS LATER ||
Johnny: Mom, now can you tell me why cuss words exist?
Mom: Because some people invented them so that they could use them when something annoying happened to them.
Johnny: Damn, Mom, you shoulda told me that when I was still seven 'cause now I really feel like that person.
Out of a total population of 1.3 billion, no one in Africa actually speaks "African."
If a computer was an apartment, the only passage would be the windows.
It would have had doors, but why was it ever spelt DOS?
He was walking in the city as he was walking in the city as he was walking in the city as he was walking in the city as he was walking in the city as he was walking in the city hall in French, and then on his way to be a good friend of the situation in the city, as he had been fixed in a few hours of the situation in which he was walking. I will never shiver at the sight [of] words.
What’s the German word for BRA? Keep two from floppin'.
Whoever put an "s" in the word "lisp" was a jackass!
Words that have ho in them:
Thot Whore Asshole Horrible Horena (my ex gf)
What are the 3 shortest words in the English language?
“Is It In?”
Why was one afraid of every number in the world?
Because ONE wanted TWO get something THREE FOUR FIVE at the yard sale, but SIX was not there. SEVEN EIGHT NINE as well. When all but ONE remained, it got TENse.
When did “yo” mean Hello. They are so different, how did they mean the same thing. Did someone just walk up and accidentally say “llo” instead of hello and people were just like “what did you say” and the man being embarrassed just made up a story and say “oh, I said yo, which means hello in my original language.
What happens when a pun isn’t funny?
It gets PUNished.
*insert pun here*
How can you help a llama on holiday?
Alpaca your bags.
What is the longest word in the English Dictionary? "Smiles," because there is a mile between the first letter and the last.
When a donkey digs a tunnel, it is called a burro.
