New HI Jokes - Page 43 - Worst Jokes Ever

"Hi, this is Pete's pizzeria and abortion clinic, where yesterday's loss is today's sauce."

How did Capetian Hook kill himself? He wiped his butt with the wrong hand.

He slips, he falls, he dislocates his balls!

Hi, please like for good luck!

There were 5 people on an airplane.

1. The pilot 2. The businessman 3. The Minister 4. The school child 5. The Smartest person in the world

The plane takes off, a good, solid 1 hour in. The pilot comes out and says, "OK guys, I have good news and bad news."

"Bad News is the plane is gonna crash. The good news is that I have 4 parachutes."

The pilot says to his passengers, "Well I'm a pilot, I fly planes. People depend on me!" Took a parachute and went out.

The businessman stands up and says, "Well I'm a businessman, I run companies!" Took a parachute and went out.

The smartest person in the world stands up and says, "I'm the smartest person in the world. No one is smarter than me!" Took a parachute and went out.

Now the minister says to the school child, "Well God has given me a good life. I want you to take the last parachute," and the school child has a massive smile on her face and starts laughing all of the sudden and the minister says, "Why are you smiling?! We're about to die!!!!"

And the school child says to the minister, "Well actually [we're] not gonna die because there are still 2 parachutes left because the smartest person in the world just took my school bag!"

Jonny went to Disney and they had sour balls. He asked the cashier for some and he pulled down his pants.

What did the blind kid get for his birthday?

I don't know, he still didn't look.

An eight-year-old girl struggles to breathe as she lies on a hospital bed and waits for the doctor to come. After the doctor comes, he pulls his cock out of her mouth, and she can breathe much better.

I would stop bullying the orphan kid, what's he gonna do? Cry to his mommy?

I went to McDonald's to get a Big Mac. It was for his mom cause she was too fat.

Why didn't the orphan play video games with his friends?

Because his parents wouldn't let him.

One time I saw a kid crying, so I asked him where his parents were. God, I love working at an orphanage!

Some people say I'm rude, but I think I'm pretty nice because the other day I saw this kid crying on the road and I asked him where his parents were. I just love looking at an orphanage.

Why did the orphan cross the road?

Not to see his parents.

What were the balloon's last words to his Father?

"Watch me, Pop!"

I was at the orphan place, and I saw a kid crying. And I asked him where his parents are, and he fainted.

What caused Captain Hook's death?

He accidentally used the wrong hand to wipe his ass.

"I work with animals," a man said on his Tinder date. "That's so sweet," she replies. "I love a man who works with animals. Where do you work?" "At the butcher shop!"