Hes Jokes

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he wanted to get to the other side.

I will always remember my grandpa's last words after robbing a bank: "Oh, shit! The pigs are catching up!" But the cops did not kill him; he drove full speed off a cliff.

What happens when someone shoots the Hulk?

He got gangryeen.

Gangrene+green+angry

When the driver ran out of fuel, what kind of gasoline did he use? Grassoline.

You're snorting cocaine with your buddies. Your eyes are closed, feeling the bliss of drugs, when suddenly something wet touches your nostril. Your buddy Mark stuck his PENIS in your face. You look up at Mark, and he says, "I'm sorry," and runs away, his pants still down.

someone play with this kitten he looks so adorable

A close-up shot of a tabby kitten lying on its back on a plaid blanket. A finger gently pets its belly. The kitten has large blue eyes, cute whiskers, and soft fur.

What does General Grievous say after he gets his penis growth pills?

A fine addition to my erection.

Penalties. Tap ins. Ghosting. Diving.

Long ago, the four lived together in harmony. Then, everything changed when the Germans attacked. Only Penaldo, master of all four elements, could stop them, but when his country needed him most, he vanished.

I woke up when I heard a strange noise coming from my kitchen.

I turned on the light, and I saw none other than the exposed flop GHOSTNALDO. He asked me if I had PenalTEA, his favorite drink. I said no and yelled, "There is a big game tomorrow!" and he disappeared.

Yo mama so black, when God saw her, he said, "Let there be light!" but twice.

Why did Jesus not win any Stanley Cups? Because he was cut from the team because he kept being pinned to the boards.

Hi, I'm Claire. I am new to this website. I have been seeing these "Legends," and I've been tracking one specifically, watersharky. I have questions about him. Is he nice, protective, single? If anyone has any more information about him, please tell me.

My son and I went on a tour to the Old Trafford Stadium. We were admiring the 76,000 seat arena when he suddenly pointed at the pitch.

“Dad, who is that man camping there?” I said, “Son, that is Bruno Penandes. He lives in that Penalty box. He only performs in small games.”

If all the class are straight but you think that someone is hiding that he's gay, you're an investiGAYtor.

Why did Tigger look in the toilet?

He was looking for "poo."

A boi found a magic vase and a genie came out and told him he had one wish. The boy said, "I wanna be like Batman." The genie said, "OK, your wish is granted."

The boy came home later that day and his parents were dead.

A turtle was walking down the street when suddenly a snail came and robbed him. When the police came, they asked what happened. The turtle responded, "I don't know, it all happened so fast!"