Hes jokes
When my dog barks, he gets ruff.
When my dog starts to bark, he starts to get ruff.
My dad died when we couldn't remember his blood type. As he died, he kept insisting for us to "be positive," but it's hard without him.
The real reason Steven Hawking died is he was drunk and tried to go down a flight of stairs.
Why wasn’t the duck afraid to cross the road? Because he wasn’t chicken!
There was a guy how had a stroke, eh.
He's all right.
What do you call a dog with no legs?
It doesn't matter what you call him, he isn't coming.
Why did Steven Hawking die?
He lost Wi-Fi connection and didn't get the data plan.
The boy ran into the gym, why?
Because he wanted to ketch-up with everyone. Also, he got pun-ishment from his "momster."
Why was 7 afraid of 9? Because he's a registered sex offender.
What is Trump's favorite snack?
Cheetos.
(Get it? He looks like a Cheeto!)
Stephen Hawking isn't dead, he's just can't walk to the shop and get new batteries. 🙄
What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend?
He wiped his butt.
The doctor says to the woman, "There was good and bad news." The woman says she wants the bad news first. The doctor says, "The bad news is the baby had red hair." Then he said, "The good news is, it is dead."
Stephen Hawking died because he got unplugged from his Ethernet cord.
Why did James fall off the swing?
He had no arms.
How did Stephen Hawking die?
He lost a water gun fight.
Why is Peter Pan always flying?
Because he Neverlands!
Daughter: Mommy, what ever happened to Steven Hawking?
Mother: He died.
Daughter: How did he die?
Mother: He never got recharged.
Why did God create women with pussies?
Because:
1. Of course, God is a man.
2. Of course, he isn't gay.
3. Of course, he is a perv too (for wanting more pussies)!