Hes jokes
Why did Paul Walker cross the street?
Because he wasn't wearing his seatbelt.
Why did Steven Hawking have no friends?
He couldn’t stand anyone...
Stephen Hawking died because he got hacked by me, and the update was too strong.
How did Stephen Hawking die? He lost internet connection.
What's small, has no dad, and looks like Bugs Bunny?
Ben after he trips over the giant curb!
As he threw the mechanical pencil toward me, I knew that if I didn't move, I would be lead into serious trouble.
Wanna hear something bad? A pile of dead babies.
Wanna hear something worse? The one at the bottom is still alive.
Wanna hear something worse than that? He has to eat his way out.
Wanna hear something that's the worst? He comes back for seconds.
Once, there was a Minecraft child molester on the Minecraft Facebook. He asks a kid his age. The kid blocks him.
Why did the boy drop his ice cream?
He got hit by a bus.
Stephen Hawking isn't actually dead. He is just having an update.
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
He turned off the Wi-Fi.
If Stephen Hawking had a FIFA card, he would have 99 dribble.
Q. Two gay guys are having sex, when suddenly the house catches fire. Who gets out of the house first, the guy on top or bottom?
A. The guy on the bottom because he already has his shit packed.
Yo mama's so fat, when God said, "Let there be light," he asked her to move out of the way.
There was a fancy dress party; the theme was emotions.
One guy came dressed in green, and he was envy; another person came dressed in red, and she was anger; another guy came dressed in blue, and he was sadness. Two Indians came, one came with a hole in a pear and his d*** was in the pear, said he was deep in dis"pear." The other Indian came with his d*** in custard, and he said he was f***ing dicustard!
20 years of sex in the dark, the wife finds out he was using a dildo. The wife gets angry and says, "Explain the dildo, prick." The husband says, "Explain the children, bitch."
One day, a skeleton wasn't laughing. Someone asked him why he was not laughing. It turns out he fell and broke his bone, his funny bone that is.
A father and three sons are renovating a house when a wall of that house collapses and breaks the father's back. Keeping calm, he tells the sons, "Well, I guess this is what you would call back-breaking labor." He chuckled, then passed out from pain.
Bambi was calmly eating grass. All of a sudden, a red dot pointed near his heart caught his attention. He looked around anxiously, and he saw a man in camouflage. He whispered, "Time to join mother, Bambi!" Bambi knew what this meant. He ran. He heard a gunshot, followed by a wave of extreme pain. Bambi fell to the ground. He glanced at his leg, which was no longer attached to his body. The man in camouflage came up to him and stabbed him in the heart. Everything went black...
Why did the chicken cross to the U.S. from Mexico?
To get to the U.S., but he had to show his papers first.