Hes jokes
Why didn't the right angle go to college? Because he had 90 degrees.
The Chinese food owner always brings us free food. I ask my sister why he does that. My sister said, "Love him long time."
What did the Orphan say when he Googled Orphan jokes?
I would say these jokes hit home, but there is no home to hit.
Why was the cow afraid?
Because he's a coward!
If the dyslexic man wanted to adopt a kid, then how could he sign the papers?
My friend Joe was a great hunter. He always shot like 3 deer every week.
He was even better at school when he bagged 30 of them.
My friend Amir didn’t have the greatest driving record because of all the car crashes he got in. He only crashed his plane once in a building, so he had a much better flying record.
When a Muslim dies, he gets 72 virgins.
It's the same thing with priests, except the virgins are children.
Lol, I keep stealing my dad's medication money, and the best part is he never remembers.
Why is the Reaper not funny at all?
Well, he tells dead jokes!
My owl turned 180 today.
He isn’t old, he just has a bad neck.
I'm funny but sad, I submit jokes you'll love. Look for my name in jokes you've read. Anyway.
What did the man with no hands get for his birthday? Gloves. Just kidding, he didn't have the chance to open the gifts.
Little Jimmy asked his mom if he could take a bath with her since he was scared of being alone. She said, "Sure, just don't look up." He looked up and said, "Woah, what are those?" She replied, "Those are just headlights." He looked down and said, "What is that?" She said, "That's just a bush." The next day, mommy wasn't home, so he asked to take a shower with his papa instead. He said, "Okay, but don't look up." He looked up and said, "Woah, what is that?" His papa replied, "That's just a snake." Later that night, he asked to sleep with his parents. They said, "Okay, just don't look under the covers." After a while, he grew bored and went under the covers. Jimmy screamed, "Mom, turn on the headlights, the snake is in the bush!"
Jesus took bread and said, "This is my flesh!" Then he took wine and said, "This is my blood!" Then he took mayonnaise, and Peter said, "Holy shit, now we gotta stop him!"
He's fat!
The only reason he died was because Virgin Media wifi crashed.
I talked to your doctor. He said you wasn’t going to make it because your stretch marks look like pieces of bacon.
Do you know why Peter Pan is always flying?
Because he Neverlands!
Why do bunnies like Bruno Mars? Because he got 24 carrots.
Jack and his kids went to the lake, and his mother wants him to go swimming. You know what he says? "Back where you came from!"