A father and son duo are sitting at a table, eating breakfast. The father looks at the child and says, "I'm hungry." The child looks at the father and replies, "Hi Hungry, I'm Son." The father calls his father and asks why he was named Hungry.
Hes Jokes
Little Johnny was sitting in class one day, and the teacher was talking about life. The teacher asked him, "Little Johnny, how do you want your wife to be like?" Little Johnny answered, "Like the moon." The teacher said, "That's such a beautiful answer because it's calm and peaceful." Little Johnny replied, "No, because it appears at night and disappears in the morning."
Why are you censoring my friend Franz? He's just making jokes, but you admins get offended too easily, f*cktards!
What's the difference to a kamikaze and bin Ladin?
Bin Ladin survived when he went into a building. I have aids.
A lady asked if I heard about the mass shooting in Ohio. I said yes, my friend died there. She said I’m so sorry. I said yeah, I tried telling him the police had good aim. Worse than that, he just found out his sister was cheating on him.
I told the doctor I didn’t want a brain surgery. But he changed my mind.
How does he go for a poo? He logs out.
You know what they say: "Location, location, location." So my dad stuck a thermometer up his butt, and now he has degrees.
Do you want to know why I hired a protractor to tutor my nephew in IIROC? Because he has degrees. 180 of them. So he's smar[t].
Why didn't the right angle go to college? Because he had 90 degrees.
The Chinese food owner always brings us free food. I ask my sister why he does that. My sister said, "Love him long time."
What did the Orphan say when he Googled Orphan jokes?
I would say these jokes hit home, but there is no home to hit.
Why was the cow afraid?
Because he's a coward!
If the dyslexic man wanted to adopt a kid, then how could he sign the papers?
My friend Joe was a great hunter. He always shot like 3 deer every week.
He was even better at school when he bagged 30 of them.
My friend Amir didn’t have the greatest driving record because of all the car crashes he got in. He only crashed his plane once in a building, so he had a much better flying record.
When a Muslim dies, he gets 72 virgins.
It's the same thing with priests, except the virgins are children.
Lol, I keep stealing my dad's medication money, and the best part is he never remembers.
Why is the Reaper not funny at all?
Well, he tells dead jokes!
My owl turned 180 today.
He isn’t old, he just has a bad neck.
