Hes jokes
Why does Santa Claus have such a big sack?
Because he only comes once a year.
Why can’t an orphan play baseball? Because he can’t find home plate.
Sadly, blind jokes are cruel. A kid at my school was punched the other day for being blind.
Sadly, he didn't see it coming.
Why couldn’t the midget ride the bus?
He can’t slam dunk his bus fare!
A nucleus walked into a bar. He asked the bartender, “How much for a drink?” The bartender replied, “For you, NO CHARGE!”
"hvhuhdsjcjdsijdskdsivhdsvhsjdvnsjdvdshvgdshgsdhfgh" That's what my friend said when he gave an EpiPen. I don't know why, though.
If I was going to the doctor, he asked me to turn around, and he stuck a nettle in my ass.
Kid: I want to be Batman.
Okay, when he gets home, his parents are dead.
Why were people sad when John F. Kennedy got shot? All he got was head.
Logic fire bars in Fortnite sped up to sound like he [is a] chipmunk like Alvin, Simon, and Theodore :)
You know why the teacher punished Dairy Milk?
Answer: Because he was choco_'late' to school.
Why do many New Yorkers like watching Spider-Man?
Because he’s always on the webcast.
Why don't people sit next to the cheetah during a test?
Because he's a cheetah!
How do you know Thor has your back?
He's an Asgardian (ass guardian).
One day I was walking around, then saw this mom mad at her kid and screamed, "You're adopted!" He said, "Yeah, I know. My REAL mommy is still at home with daddy."
Q: Why did the Scarecrow from the Wizard of Oz win an award?
A: Because he was outstanding in his field.
There was once a kid named Timmy. His father and mother went to bed one night and didn't hear or see Timmy come with them.
They all get under the covers. Timmy, still unnoticed, looks under the covers and lets out a blood-curdling scream. "MOMMY, WATCH OUT! THERE IS A SNAKE GOING INTO YOUR BIG BLACK HAIRY BUSH!" And he proceeds to say, "DON'T WORRY MOMMY, I'LL GET IT!" And he takes his father's penis in his mouth and chomps down.
Now I want you to think what their breakfast conversation was the next morning.
Why did Helen Keller’s boyfriend have wax on his finger? Because he was whispering sweet nothings into her ear!
Stephen Hawking is the fastest footballer ever--he could just charge up the Left Wing!
Roses are red. Violets are blue. If he's busy on Valentine's Day, the side chick is you.