Hes jokes
Did Jesus die a virgin?
No... He got nailed! đ
Yo mama so black, when God saw her, he said, "Let there be light!" but twice.
Did you hear the one about the Polish elevator operator?
He was fired from his job because he couldnât learn the route.
If the captain of the Titanic was dumb, he would eat the iceberg.
A 7-foot-tall man walks into a restaurant with his 4-foot-tall girlfriend, and the maitre d' says to the waiter, âHe must be nuts over her.â
Do you know why Santa's sack is so big? He only comes once a year.
There was once a Spanish magician. He said, "Uno, dos..." and he disappeared without a tres.
Despite Michael Jacksonâs legal problems while he was alive, McDonaldâs is still going to honor his life achievements in the music industry by naming a sandwich after him.
Theyâre going to call it the McMichael! Itâs going to be a fifty year old piece of meat pressed between two eight year old buns.
A guy does not know anything. Oh, wait, he has dementia.
A man bought steroids from Amazon.com... He was expecting a big package to come!
So, my son is into astronomy, and he asked how stars die. I said, "Usually overdose."
"Jack and Jill went home because he was sick because of the virus in town, gave him a frown, and his arms were pricked."
My uncle died on 9/11. At least he died doing what he loved, flying planes.
A prisoner dug out of prison. He appeared in a playground. He said, "I'm free, I'm free!" A kid said, "So what? I'm four."
Child: Hello, I canât find my dad.
Stranger: Oh, well when and where did you last see him?
Child: Oh, I remember, 5 years ago he went to get some milk here.
There was an Indian riding in the desert when he saw a little blond-haired white girl up ahead. He heard her crying. So he went up to her and climbed down from his horse and asked her, "Hey, whatâs going on? Why are you crying? Where are your parents? What happened?"
The girl said in a crying, sad voice, "The bandidos came, killed my father, my brothers, then my mother, and raped my sister."
The Indian just laughed, untied and dropped his breechcloth, then said, âGuess this isnât your day, is it?â
A child is determined to burn his home down. His dad watched, tears in his eyes. He put his arm across the mother and stated, âThatâs arson.â
Jack and Jill went up the hill so Jack can eat her candy. He got sick when he got a mouthful of dick and realized her name was Randy.
Why is he sooo dam fineee?
My impression of Michael Jackson's butler:
When answering the phone: "No, sorry, he's dead." *hangs up phone*