Happening

Happening jokes

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When I went to basketball training, there was a giant bag of basketballs on the floor.

My friend was like, "That's a huge sack of balls!"

He didn't realize what was about to happen.

"That's what she said!"

A father and a son were painting pictures together. The son and father were drawing the exact same thing to a T, and the son said, "What happened to your hand?" looking at the scar tissue near the father's knuckle. The father replied with, "You know what happened, you were there." The son continues to deny this until they both finish their paintings. They're exactly the same.

The father passes out for a few hours and wakes up to find that there's only one painting.

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    • What happened when Obama ran for president?

    The whole US thought, "Holy hell, it's Osama bin Laden!" Thought he was dead.

    What happened to the terrorist who tried to blow up a bus?

    He burnt himself on the exhaust pipe.

    What happens if you mix a dick with a potato?

    You get a dictator dic-dick-tator-potato!

    You know, I got a SKELETON of these jokes. All are HUMERUS. Yeah, this gets under people’s SKIN, but I guess you could call their FUNNY BONE BROKEN! People try and hit me when this happens, luckily, I got THICK SKIN! Yeah, thanks for listening. Hope you got these puns down TO THE BONE!

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    • My parents told me I was born on the highway.

    Apparently that’s where most accidents happen.

    I love how all these jokes about different accidents have happened, but why isn't anyone writing about how much of an accident we all were?

    Why did the Royal Wedding get more publicity than the SantaFe school shooting?

    'Cause Royal Weddings don't happen every week.

    What happens once every minute, twice every millennium, but never in a hundred years?

    The letter M.

    101 pedo jokes.

    Why's everything x2, need to get this shit dick off before the coppers come, it's called women taking advantage, you'll shit the bitcoin, 90% percent of pedo's who don't admit they're like kids blame the police, shit your kappas, you only want my veins why don't you inject me with smack, run in with ya black armbands, I've been sized for a million pound, stop giving me strain asking questions, I know what's going to happen next, bet the judge is a women, jealous coz your drink tastes like shit?

    Is it coz your shit though? How many bids have you done? Shit 1 million views, don't try bribe me, did the police give me snip? How's my barbie doll or shall I say my little pony? The police beat fuck outta me, what's all these needle marks on my arm, I can tell you want something, why's everything like one big cycle, police own the dark web.

    Keep it going on lol.

    Daughter: Mommy, what ever happened to Steven Hawking?

    Mother: He died.

    Daughter: How did he die?

    Mother: He never got recharged.

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