DoS jokes
What do you call a bad "egg" meme?
Deep fried!
What do you need in order to crash a train?
A bad track record.
What do you call a blonde?
A piss-head.
How do you get a hippie chick pregnant?
You cum on her feet and let the flies do the rest.
A panda walks into a bar. He asked the bartender for a sandwich and then proceeds to shoot him, then leaves the bar. Later on, after asking witnesses, the police track down the panda and take him to the station. They question him and ask, “Why’d you do it?” The panda replied, “It’s what pandas do, look it up.” So they did, they went on Wikipedia, and there it was: Pandas eat shoots and leaves.
What do you call a moose that doesn't want to be known? Anonymoose.
What kind of shorts do clouds wear?
Thunderwear.
What do you get when you cross a cold wind with a feather?
A brrrrrrrr-d!
What country do French Fries come from? Grease.
What do you call someone with a rubber toe?
Roberto.
What do you call German Music in Spanish? Españodelling.
One day Nathan came in ten minutes late to Mr. Jones's class. Mr. Jones asked him, "Nathan, what do you have to say for yourself?" Nathan says, "Please sir, I was on top of Cherry Hill." Then Dave came in a further ten minutes late to Mr. Jones's class. Mr. Jones asked him, "Dave, what do you have to say for yourself?" Dave says, "Please sir, I was on top of Cherry Hill." Then Mike came in a further ten minutes late to Mr. Jones's class. Mr. Jones asked him, "Mike, what do you have to say for yourself?" Mike says, "Please sir, I was on top of Cherry Hill." Then five minutes later a new girl walked in to Mr. Jones's lesson. Mr. Jones is at the end of his tether now and says, "Who are you and why are you late?" The new girl says, "Sir, I'm called Cherry Hill."
What does a glass of water ask a pond?
"Water you doing?"
What does the pond answer?
"Pondering life."
What do you get from childhood drama? A ginger with autism.
What do you get when Glen fucks an orange?
Adam.
What do you call an Indian lesbian? Minge-eater.
What do you call a convict in prison for touching little girls? A boy named Brandon.
Why do emos like circles? Because they can hang out with them.
Jared from Subway. Remember kids, "tuna sub" backwards is what I'm going to do on your face.
What do most disabled people eat?
Their arm.