DoS jokes
What cereal do I eat?
Captain Bolts.
How do make an adult cry?
Stab him 10000 times until the floors are red with human blood.
What do cigarettes and hamsters have in common?
They can both be dangerous when you stick them in your mouth and light them on fire.
What do you call it when an orphan takes a family photo? A selfie.
What do you do when an orphan takes a family photo?
A selfie.
What do you call an orphan taking a family photo?
A selfie.
Three scientists are doing an experiment. They are trying to find out what happens when you stick a cork in an elephant's ass.
In the lab, they each look at each other and decide that they should hire a monkey to do it. The monkey sticks the cork up the elephant's ass, and the scientists wait three weeks.
The monkey pulls out the cork, and all three scientists go back and discuss what they saw.
The first one, standing one mile away, says all he could see was a wave of brown, then it all went black. The second, standing two miles away, said the same. The third, who was standing three miles away, said all he could see was the other two get consumed by a massive cloud of brown.
How do you get ten babies in a bowl?
A blender.
How do you get them out?
Doritos.
One day, I saw a kid beating up a fat kid. But a cop came out of nowhere and threw the bully off him. The cop then asked the bully, "Why are you beating him up?" I responded, saying, "I'm fighting obesity; no children should suffer from diabetes and heart disease." Then, the cop pulled out a gun and fired, afterwards saying, "Well, how did I do?"
What did the icicle say to the snow?
"Why do you have to be so soft?"
When deaf people see someone yawning, do they think they're screaming?
What do you call a dog wearing a beret?
Smeargle!
What do you call an anorexic bitch with a yeast infection?
Quarter pounder with cheese.
How do you organize a space party?
You planet.
Guy 1: P-gay or T-gay?
Guy 2: P-gay sounds cooler.
Guy 1: Yeah me too. I don't like P-ewDiePie, always love T-series.
Guy 2: Omg what did i just say? I wasn't even knowing what were you talking about :<
Guy 1: Like I do care :$
Guy 3: But I do care :<
Guy 1: F*ck you.
Guy 3: Do it.
Guy 2: But you do care about me.
Guy 3: No.
Guy 2: F*ck you.
Guy 3: Do it.
:D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D
Guy 1: Why is my cat so angry?
Guy 2: Because she wants to eat your big sausage.
Guy 1: Don't you?
Guy 2: Yeah, it seems delicious.
Guy 1: Mmm, so... w-wait what are you doing? I didn't think you meant the one in my lunch :< Where are you leaving #_#
**Meow...**
Guy 1: Shut up, I will never feed you this sausage. It's not for you :< -_- </3
How do bees get to school?
They take the buzz.
Do you know the difference between toilet paper and a shower curtain?
So you're the one!
What do you call two Latinos playing baseball one on one?
A sad guy called "nun" is crying next to the grave of his best friend called "month". "Month" got killed by a gay guy, and after that, "nun" got homophobic.
While "nun" is sitting next to "month"'s grave, he heard a guy ask his friend: 《Do You Wanna Play A Game On?》 "Nun" got angry and he asked that guy: 《What did you just say to your friend?》 The guy answers: 《A game on, why?》
"Nun" kills the two guys.
🤔