DoS jokes
I caught my mom licking up and down and deep throating a banana. I said, "Why are you doing that?" She replied, "I’m doing it for practice for who could suck the best dick contest in the neighborhood."
An alien walks into a bar. There is a guy sitting next to him, and the alien touches his shoulder.
The man says, "Do that one more time and I'll run you over." The alien does it again and gets ran over. They get back in the bar and he touches him again. The man says, "Do that again and I'll chop your dick off." He touches him again. The man pulls the alien's pants down and pulls out his knife. He was astonished at what he found. There was nothing there! He looks up at the alien and looks at his finger and fainted.
Whenever I’m bored, I hit up my local orphanage and beat some of them up.
I mean honestly, what are they going to do, tell their parents? 😂😂
My mom told me that she and the owner of a Chinese restaurant made a deal. Now we get free Chinese food. So I ask my mom why do we get free Chinese food? Then my mom said, "I love him long time."
What does a deaf person do when they hear people scream? I don't know; it's not like they're gonna hear it anyway.
"Knock knock!"
"Who's there?"
"Baby!"
"Baby who?"
"Do you want to eat this baby that I have prepared?"
"No thanks, I already ate."
If you're ever bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
What do you call an hourglass with no sand in it?
A waist of time.
What do you get when you eat a hamburger?
Mustard gas.
How do you put "blonde" and "duh" in the same sentence? Just say, "Blondes are dumb."
What do french fries 🍟 do when they meet?
They ketchup.
What do you call a wingless fly?
A walk!
I would create an orphan website...
But you need a home page to do that.
(Since somebody stole this joke before) 🤷♀️
I would create an orphan website, but you need a homepage to do that.
I have a really good joke.
Do you want to hear it?
Oh wait, this is a bad joke website.
There was a news story the other day where a magician disappeared. He was like "At the count of 3 I will disappear aight...Uno, Dos," and he disappeared without a trace.
What do you call a midget that waves? A microwave.
Hello, I'm hahaha. What do you call a funny rubber toe?
Roberto!!~!~!!! AaaaAQAAAHAHAHAA. And like hahaha, what's wrong with airline food? They're not black and they're not people.
what do you call a shadow stalker REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
What do you call a blind German? A Nazi (Not-see)!