DoS jokes
What do you call a family picture for an orphan?
A selfie.
what do you call an autistic police officer? special forces
Guy and Girl are in the shower talking to each other.
Guy: Let's drop the soap.
Girl: Let's do it!
Why was the North Tower a bad doctor when the South Tower collapsed?
Because the North Tower didn’t do CPR.
What do depressed teenagers and fruits have in common?
They both hang by something.
Where do terrorists go for food? The Allah snack bar.
What do you say when your pet pig gets lost?
This is a pig problem!
What do dogs and planks have in common? They both have to be walked.
Do you play COC?
Because it’s a pretty good game.
Why do orphans become criminals? To know what it’s like to be wanted.
My son caught me masturbating. He asked me, "What are you doing?" and I said, "Don't worry, son, you'll be doing it soon." He asks, "Why is that?" and I said, "My arm's getting tired."
Q: How do you knock out 26 kids in one punch?
A: You give them a Sandy Hook.
Cool people: I can do anything.
Normal people: I can do nothing.
What do you call a fat motivational speaker?
Four chin teller.
What do you call a terrorist in a bathtub?
Bathbomb.
Why do orphans go to prison?
Because that's their only home.
Why do orphans only have 362 days in a year?
Because they don't have Mothers', Fathers', and Family Day!
What do a priest and a pedo have in common?
Nothing, they both like kids.
What do you call an Asian, a blind man, and a very bad driver?
Your forehead is so big, it gets home 50 min before you do.