What do you call a parent that is pregnant?
Buy one, get one free.
DoS Jokes
A wife was cleaning her 12-year-old son’s bedroom when she found a load of serious bondage gear and fetish mags. She asked her husband, “What do we do?”
The husband said, “I’m no expert, but I wouldn’t fucking spank him.”
I hate it when I go to the shop and people are like, "Oh, hey what are you doing here?"
Me: "Oh, you know, just hunting elephants."
The guy who discovered milk... What did he do with the cow?!
Confusion life question!!!
* Can you cry underwater? * Do fishes ever get thirsty? * Why don't birds fall out the tree when they sleep? * Why is a building called that when it's already built? * When they say dog food is new and improved, who tastes it?
What do you call a Mexican without a lawnmower?
Unemployed.
Wanna know something the orphan could never do?
Wish anyone a happy Mother’s Day or Father’s Day.
Q: How do you know if an Asian broke into your house?
A: All your homework and the Rubik's cube you spent a year on and still can’t solve is solved. 🤓🤓🤓🤓
What do you call a pole dancer?
A stripper.
My friend: I want to cut myself.
Me: No, don’t do that. *hands lighter* Do this instead.
What do you call an Asian that was born too early?
Wong Tai Ming.
If I slap an orphan, what will it do, tell its parents? 🤣😂🤣😂
What do rednecks find when they research their family tree?
Their INCESTors!
What do trans men and Pinocchio have in common?
Both are lying when they say "I'm a real boy."
(I'm a trans man myself lol)
Do you know that Helen Keller had a dog?
Neither did she.
Why do orphans not use iPhones?
Because they don't have a home button.
What do they call Dwayne "the Rock" Johnson's son? The Pebble.
So recently I hit an orphan with a 2x4, and he started crying. What's he gonna do? Tell his family? XD
What do iPhones and the Titanic have in common?
There's no Jack!
What do the Titanic and the Sixth Sense have in common?
Icy dead people.
