Die jokes
A man died and went to heaven. Every time you cheat, you get a worse car.
The first man cheated 5 times; he got a Jeep. The second man cheated 3 times; he got a BMW. The third man never cheated; he got a Lamborghini.
The second man saw the third man sad. He said, "Why are you sad?" The third man said, "I saw my wife with a scooter."
How do you get a koala to die? Kill it.
How did Helen Keller die?
Her ex gave her plutonium and told her to eat it.
I would like to die like my Islamic father, in his sleep, but not like the rest of the people in the plane or those in those identical towers.
If you like this post, you will die!!!! Don’t do it 👿😅😎
My grandpa died in 9/11. I was told his last words were "Allahu Akbar."
My dad died in 9/11, and that was the second worst thing that happened to me with a plane, next to Soul Plane.
When ordering food at a new restaurant, my wife asked the waiter what they do to prepare their chicken.
“Nothing special,” he explained. “We just tell them they’re going to die.”
Why did Techno die?
They broke his bed.
The biggest inconvenience in 2001, I thought, was my brother. Turns out it was 9/11. I guess the planes saw him be born and died from how ugly he was. Aluh aluckbar.
Have you heard about the Pillsbury Dough Boy? He died of a yeast infection.
Why do people not adhere to the corona measures?
Because they hate their lives and want to die.
When you die, scientists will preserve your skull.
Yesterday I had a party.
I got questioned about five dead kids locked up in a box.
I did that when I was 13. Damn, I forgot about them!
Guess why Stephen died?? Because his wife forgot to put him on charge at night.
Bin Laden's relatives died in a plane crash on 8/1! #justice
Pilot: This is my last flight, everyone.
Passengers: *Clap*
Pilot: I became a pilot for one reason: To conquer my greatest fear.
Flight Attendant: And what is that?
Pilot: Dying alone. *speeds up towards Twin Towers*
Also the Pilot: Now who is ready to play some Jen---
The reason why Steven H. died was that someone poisoned his chocolate mousse.
One of my family members died on 9/11, he was one of the best pilots in the Middle East.
Your mom is so fat she won't be in a coffin when she dies. She won't fit in it.