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Shower thoughts. U know u have serious acne when blind people try to read ur face-As a kid my parents taught me to not believe everything I see on TV, now I have to teach them to not believe everything they see on Facebook-Aliens invaded the Moon on July 20th, 1969— Vehicles today can surf the web, link to your phone, stream music and videos, etc.. but they still can't perform a simple database lookup to tell you what the check engine light is on for.-If you run at 11pm you are a night person. If you run at 5am you are a morning person. If you run at 3am you are a suspicious person

Hey guys, i ́m at the library right now, my parents think i ́m studing, but i ́m not. I have some sad news. My parents are going to divorce. It ́s not because of this, but because of something else happening right now.

Where the fuck is the community. I'm getting a bit lonely and bored. Jake, please come back bro. Impostor Hailey, go kys. Real Hailey, please come back. Same with you, Caitlyn. This website is a dump now.

Im gonna fucking kms, why? THIS- bro im crying rn (not as a joke) here is the email I sent my mom

Uhm, remember when I gave your number to my friend? so when I pass my classes I can go over to their house? They had their number in their backpack pocket, and they were like "ADDISON IM GONNA CALL YOUR MOM" I freaked out, and I don't wanna get in trouble, so I'm apologizing now, instead of waiting until get home, and they called you about planned pregnancy, and I took the phone out of their hands and tried hanging up, but it didn't work, and I'm sorry. please don't me mad.

and I'm crying so hard rn ima kms

I was drying my hair while browsing twitter for too long now my hair is fucked up lol •_•

SHREK

Written by

William Steig & Ted Elliott

SHREK Once upon a time there was a lovely princess. But she had an enchantment upon her of a fearful sort which could only be broken by love's first kiss. … Read more

Shower Thoughts:

- Cheating in exams is just studying at the wrong time. - Parents are the opposite of fake friends. They have your back when you aren't there and talk shit about you to your face. - Technically, the biggest difference between surfing and snowboarding is just the temperature of the water. - If a tomato is a fruit, is ketchup a smoothie? - Does a straw have one hole or two? - Can you daydream at night? - When you’re alone in a room, you’re the only person in the world who can see what you can. - Millions of people are in synchronization with your breathing right now.

Put the worst thing that happened to you but, it really funny now, looking back and remembering it.

bro @avaiscool this dude is 15 and your thirteen, he literally tryna pick you up so you can ride his dick man. dont trust him. he's been doing this every .single. day. first he liked lizz then , sad sarah, prob some other girl, now you. i fucking done with his shit man. like we are not friends, and we will never be.

Now, for the special 10 follower one:

Arnold Schwarzenegger has a long one. Micheal J. Fox has a short one. Madonna does not use hers. Bill clinton always uses his. The pope never uses his. What is it?

Alr guys, from now on, you have to be considered worthy to have followers. In order to be worthy, you must answer the riddle I have correctly, after that, you will be given a follower. There will be special riddle that are worth 10 followers.

Ima log off for now and try to be happy again if y'all wanna know what wrong look at what Marleigh texted be back on in the next hour or so I hop