
Break down jokes
Three men were going for a drive through the desert. An hour later, the car breaks down. They all take something from the car to keep themselves cool as they walk to the nearest gas station a few miles back.
One guy grabs a hand-held fan. Another guy grabs the jug of water. The last guy takes the car door off. About 15 minutes into walking, the other two are giving the one guy weird looks. Finally, one of them asks why he is taking the car door. The third guy just replies that whenever he gets hot he can just roll down the window.
What happens when a frog's car breaks down?
It gets toad away!
Why does a robot malfunction when they get sad?
Because they have a break down.
"The rise of atheism is going to lead to a break down of social morals and lead to all kinds of filth, including an increase in child abuse," said the village priest.
The village scientists did some fact checking. In prison, they found roughly 70% of child abusers were hyper religious before committing the crimes, and another 20% converted to religions to look 'remorseful'. The remaining 10% preferred not to say. They presented the findings to the media.
"Scientists slander good religious folk and ignore the weight of evidence!"
"Is Science biased against religion? You decide in this survey," they reported.
The village priest is living at his majesty's convenience and tells the others he committed armed robbery.
"Why is this a joke? It's not even funny!" said the person reading this, breaking the forth wall.
What is funny is you got to the end of this post and didn't cringe. Why not?
Knock knock! Who's there? It's Dave! Dave who? Dave proceeds to break down crying at the realization that his grandmother's Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she no longer remembers him.
Yo mama's like a fridge, she breaks down when she loses her cool.
What do you do when your dishwasher breaks down?
You punch her in the face and remind her of her duties.
Phone: YEETED.
TikTok: DELETED.
Therapy: NEEDED.
Wife: BEATED.
Oooh, I fall apart. Oooh, yeah, mmhmm. She told me that I'm not enough, yeah, And she left me with a broken heart, yeah. She fooled me twice and it's all my fault, yeah. She cut too deep, now she left me scarred, yeah. Now there's too many thoughts goin' through my brain, yeah, And now I'm takin' these shots like it's Novocaine, yeah. Oooh, I fall apart Down to my core Oooh, I fall apart Down to my core Oooh, didn't know it before Surprised when you caught me off guard All this damn jewelry I bought You was my shorty, I thought Never caught a feelin' this hard Harder than the liquor I pour Tell me you don't want me no more But I can't let go Everybody told me so Feelin' like I sold my soul Devil in the form of a whore Devil in the form of a whore You said it No, you said it No, you said it We'd be together Oooh, I fall apart Down to my core Oooh, I fall apart Down to my core Oooh, didn't know it before Surprised when you caught me off guard All this damn jewelry I bought You was my shorty, I thought Ice keep pourin' and the drink keep flowin' Try to brush it off but it keep on goin' Covered in scars and I can't help showin' Whippin' in the foreign and the tears keep blowin' Ice keep droppin' and the drink keep flowin' Try to brush it off but it keep on goin' All these scars, can't help from showin' Whippin' in the foreign and the tears keep blowin', yeah Oooh, I fall apart Down to my core Oooh, I fall apart Down to my core Oooh, didn't know it before Surprised when you caught me off guard All this damn jewelry I bought You was my shorty, I thought.
Fall
My boyfriend thinks he’s hilarious.
Him: How do you break things?
Me: You break things up.
Him: Okay.
Me: Is everything okay?
Him: We’re a twig. We’re breaking up.
What hurts the most? 😹
A. Breaking up before chewing.
B. Breaking up after chewing.
Community talk
Guys, I know this is crazy lady talk, but please just bare with me. I'm worried I obviously believe in some very conterversal things, so just yeah wtvr.
Witches and spiritual people all over have agreed that they have a bad or off feeling. Like the feeling you get when something bad is going to happen, something big. Not all, but so fucking many. Theres this person, she made what she called a "Justice jar" for peo… Read more
i js need to like get this out and i cant talk to anyone so ima js say this here but im so done with school its so draining i had a whole ass mental break down and a panic attack in the bathroom tbc of school and the drama and rumors and also bc i missed my mom and bf bc he moved away and my mom is in jail then when i finally calmed down and come out of the stall i didnt know my two bsfs were in there to and i heard … Read more
Im just going to explain, or try to explain, how I feel, because I don't know what else to do before I fucking go insane.
I met Jake about like 3-4 years ago. I was 11 or 12. I came on for the worst jokes ever because of my boyfriend at the time. I quickly became attached to the site, having a place where I could speak to my IRL friends during school, and I met some really cool people. One of these people was Jake. … Read more