Both jokes
What do my wife and dinner have in common? They are both vegetables.
What do emos and the Lorax have in common?
They both hang with trees.
Yo mama so fat, she took both sides of the family.
What’s the difference between the twin towers and your parents?
Nothing, they are both just memories.
What's the difference between the Twin Towers and your parents?
Nothing. They are both just memories.
Yo mama so fat, she fell off both sides of the bed!
What do Nemo and my dad have in common?
They both can't be found.
What does a deaf person and an orphan have in common? They both can’t hear their parents.
Why can’t an orphan go to Family Dollar? They don’t have a family.
Don’t mess with an emo because if their friends pull up, you gotta fight the suicide squad.
What do orphans and blind kids have in common: They both can't see their parents.
President: Them damn flat faced n**g*rs!!
Man: We have the power of the sun itself!
President: Drop it on them!
Man: You push the button.
President: *sigh* Fine give it to me.
Man: Hands over button
President: Pushes it
Both: YAAA!
President: Bumps into the button pressing it again
Both: Oh, sh*t!
Meanwhile in Japan after the first bomb went off
Japanese man: Ah sh*t here we go again
What do Ligma and Bofa have in common?
They both ride on my dick.
What did the Emo and the Orphan have in common?
They both hang with the trees.
I was doing a 10km run with my good friend Pessi. As we were setting up our smart watches, the watch voice asked us if we wanted to do a solo run or a group run.
Pessi proceeded to smash both our watches and shout, “I don’t want solo run, I want Penalty!”
Shame on you, Pessi!
Two terrorists walk into a bar, and the bartender says, "What can I get you?"
The terrorists both say, "A beer."
The bartender overhears them talking about how they will kill 300 people and a donkey. The bartender says, "Why a donkey?"
One terrorist says, "See, I told you no one would care about the people!"
What does an orphan and a dog have in common?
Both got taken from their parents.
What's the same with your dad and Retail Row?
They are both off the map.
What did one aborted baby say to the other? Nothing. They're both dead.
I went home and I saw my friend kissing my sister. I said, "What’s going on?" They both told me that they’re going out with each other. I said, "Alright."
The next morning, I see my friend kissing my mom. I said, "What’s going here?" They both told me they’re going out with each other. Then my friend said to me, "I gave you 3 gifts. 1 gift, I’m your best friend. 2 gift, I’m your new brother-in-law. 3 gift, I’m your new stepfather." I felt so happy I had a friend that [is] looking out for me.
What does Stephen Hawking and a prostitute have in common?
They both charge.
Q: What does a slice of pizza and an F grade have in common?
A: They're both cheesy.