And jokes
My 14 year old daughter went shopping at a grocery story.
She gets to the register and she asked the cashier to scan her scarred wrist.
The cashier scanned it and replied with, "Ma'am this item is worthless."
A man is depressed and he sighs. A bully says, "Stop sighing, you sound like some guys having a threesome!"
Does anyone know what's going on with all the creeps that joined and restart your school laptop to get everything unblocked?
What's the difference between Jesus and a holy whore?
Jesus got pegged against a cross.
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?
Some guy interviewed me and asked how it felt to kill thousands of people. I replied, “I don’t know. I’ve only killed communists.”
Gather 6 friends to play Russian roulette, and one's mind will be blown away.
What is the difference between apples and orphans?
Apples actually get picked.
What does an Xbox/PlayStation and Michael Jackson have in common?
Kids turn them on.
What's the difference between a boomerang and your dad?
Boomerangs come back.
A man sees a girl crying and asks her what's wrong.
The girl replied, "Everyone keeps making fun of me."
"You should tell your parents," I replied back.
The girl started crying even more. That's when I got confused and left the orphanage.
I spat on a blind kid and told him it was raining.
I pushed a kid in a wheelchair into the school fire and said, "Hot wheels."
Jack and Jill went up the hill to get to the house. They turned the lights out. Jill shouts, "It's a dildo, WTF?"
What's the difference between a trampoline and a child?
You take your shoes off before jumping on the trampoline.
An orphan is at a barbecue and is getting food. A man asks him if he wants steak or phan I ment ham.
Little Johnny: Dad, why are you rubbing the horse's chest and butt?
Dad: I want to see if it's good enough to buy.
Little Johnny: I think Uncle Joe wants to buy Mom.
When people make accounts about you and a category.
What's cold, blue and makes women cry?
Cot death.
Why do violists smile when they play? Because ignorance is bliss, and they don't know what can't hurt them.